Time and Perspective

As our children get older, our perspective changes, but no matter how lofty the view, we can't see forever.

Deb Lewis wrote: "In looking back I've not only had the pleasure of revisiting a lot of wonderful moments, but I've also had the surprise gift of perspective, which reveals overwhelming evidence of natural learning. What I always believed to be true is no longer a matter of trust or faith; it is fact.. . . ."He is surrounded by the things that interest humans in the twenty-first century. He is surrounded by the whole of human history. He is a citizen of the world in a time when access to information has never been easier. He is learning all the time."

SandraDodd.com/deblewis/years
photo by Bob Cogliser

From a different place

"Your perspective will change when you've experienced new things, seen the world from a different place." —Debbie Regan

SandraDodd.com/feedback/perspective
photo (click it) by Annie Regan (no relation, except in the ideas!)

Your perspective will change

"Your perspective will change when you've experienced new things, seen the world from a different place." —Debbie Regan

SandraDodd.com/readalittle
photo by Cheryl Balazs

Distance and perspective

If people learn to use "learn" instead of "teach," it helps them move to another angle, to see things through a different lens.

Some people see experienced unschoolers ("experienced" meaning in this context people who have done it well and effortlessly for years, who aren't afraid anymore, who have seen inspiring results) mention classes, and they think "Ah, well if the experienced unschoolers' kids take classes, then classes are good/necessary/no problem."

But if beginners don't go through a phase in which they REALLY focus on seeing learning outside of academic formalities, they will not be able to see around academics. If you turn away from the academics and truly, really, calmly and fully believe that there is a world that doesn't revolve around or even require or even benefit from academic traditions, *then* after a while you can see academics (research into education, or classes, or college) from another perspective.

SandraDodd.com/peace/newview
photo by Heather Booth

Perspective

The same person can see the same thing more than one way. With practice, you can see things different ways without even moving. In terms of thought, perspective is no more than "seeing" something from a new angle.

SandraDodd.com/checklists
photo by Sandra Dodd

Art and Perspective

Usually the perspective people talk about with art has to do with angles and using size and color to show distance. This is about the moment, and the surroundings, and the contrast. As happens sometimes with the photos of tourists and amateurs, I did not plan this lighting and drama. I only saw it later, in the photo.



Just seconds later, the same angel, different angle, there are modern details the angel sees every day, plus Linnaea Waynforth, and across on the other wall, art by children.



This was in a church in Bunwell, in Norfolk, one town over from where Schuyler Waynforth lives. We were there to hear bell ringers practice, on a summer day in 2009.

That angel is still there, but I'm in Albuquerque at a table with a tessalations puzzle out, sitting in a wooden chair constructed without nails or screws—all mortise, tenon and peg. I have three I got at a flea market, and the ratty table that came with them. They were made in New Mexico, probably in the 1940's. They're not fancy, but they are art, and history. There's a rice bowl near me, left over from my dinner. I don't know where it was made, or by whom. There are no markings. My husband got it at a thrift store in Minnesota.

Art is where you are.

Those photos can be enlarged with a click.

The sky

"Look at those sticks poking out of the sky!!" —Gail Higgins the photographer What you see is what you think.

SandraDodd.com/perspective.html
photo by Gail Higgins

Shimmery reflections

It can't be helped, and it's really fine, that different people in a family remember things a bit differently, or have different emotions around a situation. Something might be a big deal to one or two family members, and not even be remembered by others.

My sister and I learned, when my dad died, that our relationships with him were very different, and both true and valid. We were in our early 20s, and each of us had fond memories of our dad that didn't involve the other at all, and some frustrations, similarly unrelated.

Even self-reflection can be different at different times. Things I used to be proud of look different, years later. Some decisions I was stressed about and unsure of as they unfolded look quite noble, now, from a distance.

SandraDodd.com/perspective
photo by Gail Higgins

"How Important Is It?"

Sometimes in certain meetings* this question is asked: "How important is it?"
Recently at the dentist I was under the effect of nitrous, having wild, flying thoughts, and that question flitted through. I thought the profound answer was "It depends what 'IT' is, and it depends who YOU are."

When the drugs wore off, it seemed less profound, and I thought I would keep it to myself, but the very next day my husband mentioned something being like life and death to some people, and nothing at all to others.

The photo here has the top of the monument cut off, but guess what? It's not a photo of that monument. It's an image of a dad and two daughters, who happened to be within sight of (and within camera frame of) a famous thing when they were interacting with each other so sweetly.

Perspective
photo by Chrissie Florence

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* The "certain meetings" are likely to be Al-Anon or Adult Children of Alcoholics, where people can be hung up on problems they didn't create, or on fixing things they can't fix. It's a good question lots of times, though, when someone is wound up and hyper-focussed on something that can't be fixed right there, right then (or ever) by them.

Obviously

The sign probably pointed toward a trail to the waterfall, but a different perspective can make humor, beauty, profundity, or a mess. Be careful to consider other angles, and don't believe everything you read.

SandraDodd.com/angles
photo by Gail Higgins

Sky show

Free show! Look up.

Trees change, clouds change, you might see stars, or the moon. Birds or flying machines might make special appearances.

Feel the air on your face. Breathe in peace. Summon up your gratitude.

From his perspective, a younger, smaller person might look up and see you, in the sky show.

Same sky, another view
photo by Sandra Dodd

A distant tree

Come into my thoughts a minute, just a little.

"The tree was framed by this doorway." But the doorway was just sitting there, before the tree first grew. They both are there, all the time, now. What framed the tree was where I was standing when I saw how pretty it looked, and took the photo in such a way that the whole tree showed, and the whole doorway showed. Distance mattered. My height mattered. Many relationships between things, between places, or people, depend on the perspective or the effect of another person. Surely the perception of two things changes, depending on many factors.

SandraDodd.com/angles
photo by Sandra Dodd, in Avebury

When to whine

If you notice you're angry or complaining, back away a bit, physically or mentally or emotionally, and see how big the problem really is, from a different perspective.

There is a cloud...
photo by Sandra Dodd

And behind that...

Think of something. What's on the other side of that? Remember something. What came before that? Imagine something. What could follow? See something. Remember there is more than you can see.

The words are new, but this is a cousin:
SandraDodd.com/feedback/perspective

photo by Caren Knox, who described it as
"La bella luna, flirting from behind our tree"

Hopeful, happy thoughts

Consciously draw in more hopeful, happy thoughts. Without leaving your home, without leaving your chair, you can turn 90 degrees and get a different view.

SandraDodd.com/perspective
photo by Amber Ivey

Preserve joy

With kids in the house, wanting mom's positive attention, the creation and preservation of joy provides a better environment for the whole family.

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photo by Sandra Dodd

Time is inconsistent

Time is theoretically some sort of mathematical constant, but parents know that a day can seem to last forever, and a season can seem like a lifetime—then in retrospect seems to have zoomed by. We can't live in "how will I survive this?" time nor can we live well by pining for that past we've already lived through. The best way to get through must be to do a better thing. If a conscious thought about time passage comes, think of what will be an improvement, and make that choice, however tiny, however slight. Avoiding regret, contributing joy... time will flow as it will, but we can move closer to peace.

The writing here is new, but here is more on this perspective:
SandraDodd.com/change/
photo by Sandra Dodd, on a carousel in Austin

Stuff

Old things, odd things, useful or interesting things...

Textures, shapes, colors, perspective.

Even if you don't share them with your children, the more you can see and appreciate them, the more understanding you will probably be of what they do notice and comment on. Seeing beyond "right answers," and seeing past what SHOULD be important will open up the world.

SandraDodd.com/angles
photo by Sandra Dodd

*Time out*

Yesterday's post had the wrong time, so it will be delivered today (for those who subscribe by e-mail—1533 people). Thank you for reading!

The Bayeux Tapestry post on November 2 had the wrong photo credit at first. It was Leon McNeill, not Helene McNeill. Holly caught it in the morning, but the e-mails were already out there.

This is post # 1772 or so. That's quite a few. I missed the fifth anniversary of this blog, in September. If you're reading by e-mail and you wish I had written something different, click the title and you'll be between a randomizer and a set of "You might also like:" photos and links. Even if you've read them all, your own knowledge has grown and your perspective has changed, and what you saw before will look different now.


Reminder of another blog you might want to subscribe to:
Unschooling Site News, SandraDodd.com
blog-generated selfie by Sandra Dodd, while writing the notes above

Let your child be your cause

Putting your child first while you unschool is important. When your kids grow up, you could dedicate the rest of your life to only wearing used clothes and not using electricity or charge cards or an automobile, but putting token environmental gestures first in your life causes your child to become a token environmental gesture. The environment is changed imperceptibly. His life, hugely.
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photo by Sandra Dodd