Magic (it isn't)

Read a little, try a little, wait a while, watch.

Unschooling cannot be learned by reading or writing.

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SandraDodd.com/readalittle
photo by Sandra Dodd

And then what?

A dad new to a discussion wrote:
Kids who spend more time watching TV (both with and without parent and siblings present) spend less time interacting with family members.

Joyce Fetteroll responded:

In unschooling families?

And what criteria did the use to define "interacting" for the study?

My daughter and I have done a great deal of interacting as a direct result of TV. It's tied into her other interests in story telling. Without TV she wouldn't have the huge collection of comics she's written. Without TV we wouldn't have discovered manga. Without TV we wouldn't being going to Anime conventions together (I even dress up).

—Joyce Fetteroll

SandraDodd.com/joyce/logic
image and card by Joyce Fetteroll

A kind of P.S.—what Joyce wrote in May 2015, when she shared the image of a card she wrote for unschoolers, on top of a scene from "Healer":

We're off to Chicago to see Kat. 🙂

One of the most connecting valuable things I did was get involved in Kat's interests. Manga, anime, drawing, writing, music. We still talk about writing and music especially. Carl connected through running, football and other sports. Of course we'll be seeing the Cubs and he and Kat will be going to the White Sox and then the hockey game so they're still connecting. 🙂

Learning by leaps and bounds

From a learning standpoint, when babies are carried they see more, they hear and smell more. If they are given things to touch and taste besides just a few baby toys left in the corner of a crib or playpen, they will learn by leaps and bounds. They will spend less time crying and more time being in the real world.

The parents will know the child better, and the child will know the parents better. They will be building a partnership based on trust.

SandraDodd.com/attachment
photo by Sandra Dodd, at a fabric store

Owning one's own self

Roya Sorooshian (not-yet Dedeaux) wrote:

When I was ten, my mother told me that she was going to take me out of school. At the time, I was apalled. Now, I credit that moment as the biggest turning point of my life. Not because of what we did instead of going to school, but because of the power my mother gave to me when she showed me that she did not have to abide by anyone's standards - not when she knew she could do better. She gave me to myself, forever.

—Roya Sorooshian
(Roya Dedeaux)

SandraDodd.com/teens/
photo by Roya Dedeaux

Comfortable, interesting and thoughtful

Karen James wrote:

I was a little nervous about what to expect when Ethan entered the teen years. My own teen years were kind of difficult. I have just loved being a part of Ethan's life at every stage of development, and this one is no exception. As we walked side by side at the art gallery the other day (him noticeably taller than me now!), I felt more than ever like I was with a good friend. Our interactions were comfortable and the conversation was interesting and thoughtful. I hope he felt that way too. I'm feeling more confident. It's like when he took his first steps. I knew that meant things were going to change, but I was excited to see where his next steps would lead.

—Karen James, 2016

SandraDodd.com/teens/
photo by Doug James, the dad, I'm guessing

Moving toward peace

It’s worth remembering that the energy that anger is built on accentuates a separation from other people—an us vs. them, or a ME vs. YOU/them/every-damned-other-person, and none of that can be healthy.

The quickest dissipation for anger is breathing.

Unschooling parents’ choices need to be between a more peaceful choice and a less peaceful choice, several times a day.

SandraDodd.com/breathing
photo by Sandra Dodd

Languages, words, history

Whole language involves language as communication, rather than separate parts (writing/reading/spelling). First language, then details later.

With unschooling, children will learn from the language you use and they use, from the words they see around them, from using games and computers, from signing greeting cards or playing with words. There's no need for any school-style structure at all. For those who have wondered about phonics and reading and spelling, please don't press that on your children.

Some languages are simpler than English in that the letters and sounds match pretty consistently. French and Spanish come to mind. German. But because of something that happened in 1066, and because of the history of The British Isles, and because of the isolation of some English speakers and the migration of many others, English has complexities and a crazy-large vocabulary. Our basic grammar and language are Germanic. The majority of our vocabulary is from French (look up 1066 if you don't remember what happened) and Latin, though the everyday words we use are from Anglo Saxon, which had borrowings from half a dozen Germanic dialects.

If that was a painful paragraph to read, never mind it. If that paragraph was fun for you, then you can help your children spell by looking up what language a word is from and figuring out why it looks the way it does in written English.

SandraDodd.com/phonics
photo by Caroline Lieber