Different route, same direction

Think of school like a train ride from New York to LA. It has specific stops at specific times and will last a scheduled amount of time.

Think of unschooling like crossing the country in an RV from NY to somewhere on the west coast. You won't be following the same route, won't be hitting the same cities. But you will be heading in the same general direction, following an interest-driven route.

—Joyce Fetteroll

Joyce Fetteroll on Unschooling and another thing or two
photo by Shawn Smythe Haunschild, of something interesting in Colorado
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Monumental things

Some things are a pretty big deal. What's a big deal to one person might not be so memorable to another. Things that changed my life might not have affected my sister at all, and that's fine. Each life is unique, and we don't need to agree on what is or isn't monumental, and why.

Perspective
photo by Sandra Dodd, in Texas

Be where you are

Parents complain about children living in fantasy worlds sometimes, and not growing up and facing reality. I think probably in every single one of those cases, it was the parental fantasy of what the child ought to be doing that was really the problem.

Make each moment the best moment it can be. Be where you are with your body, mind and soul. It's the only place you can be, anyway. The rest is fantasy.

Walk where you are

The quote above is from The Big Book of Unschooling
pages 79 and 80 (72 and 72 of the first edition)
photo by Cass Kotrba

Angels

Music is so divine that people like to think of angels making it. The instrument pictured, with the cherub musicians, is named after the Greek goddess Calliope, one of the muses, a daughter of Zeus. Two religions are involved already, in that 19th century steam-powered music machine. Also, it having been made in the late 19th century, it was an engineering situation involving the latest technologies. I couldn't decide whether to link this to Connections or to Mechanical Music, so here are both links. The green and flowery French Calliope down on that page is a video I made, and I went around the back to show the punch card that plays the particular song. The one pictured above works that way, too. You can go exploring from home!

photo by Sandra Dodd

Proud

Sometimes I "feel proud" of something my child has done, but it's too much ownership and I back down.

If I think of it as happy relief that I didn't prevent that success or achievement, then I can be a little proud of myself, and impressed with my offspring.

Maybe the best way I've found is to feel it as gratitude that I lived long enough to be able to see successes in my now-grown children. Gratitude is good. Joy is good.

SandraDodd.com/gratitude
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Different and ever-changing needs

"'Unschooling' bed time and meals is about responding to each child's different and ever-changing needs."

—Holly Blossom

Learning that children's needs are different and ever-changing is the path to mindful parenting. If a parent can be aware and responsive in one area, it's easy to expand into others. Some parents understand it first with "academic learning" (before they accept the connections in all learning). Some understand it first about food, or clothing. It will all connect, though, the same way the trivia children learn will coalesce into a body of knowledge.

The Holly Blossom quote is from writing newly added to the Bedtime page.
photo by Ester Siroky

Ideas, pulled in

Joyce Fetteroll wrote:

Teaching is pouring knowledge over a child. Whether a child takes it in is not in the teacher's power. Which is why teachers punish and reward to make not taking in an idea less pleasant.

Learning is a child pulling in ideas. Those ideas are most full of life when those ideas connect to other ideas the child is fascinated by. It makes no difference if those ideas connect along a particular path. Which is why natural learning looks so chaotic and meandering compared to school.

It makes it hard to create an environment for a child to explore freely and pull in what fascinates them when someone is unschooling through a fog of TEACH.

—Joyce Fetteroll

SandraDodd.com/teaching/problem
photo by Amber Ivey
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Whirl and twirl

We have made good use of making patterns in the slots of a revolving rack of poker chips, and then with poker chips out on the table. I have set out photocopied pictures and cheap water colors, lots of brushes, and had side-by-side painting by the hour. Whichever kids or visitors wander by will be drawn in and as they play or paint they talk and share and think. . . . .Working on patterns in silence allows one’s mind to whirl and twirl.

SandraDodd.com/truck
scanner art by Sandra Dodd

Icons and patterns

Design and symbolism will be a bigger deal than usual for a while, thanks to the Winter Olympics. There will be sportswear design, hairstyles, colors, flags, anthems, medals.

Look around at what is normal for you, and at what represents your own town, county, country, continent. See what is exotic, when you're away from home—things those distant locals don't notice, and don't know are not universal. To appreciate the beauty in your everyday world, it can help to see it through someone else's eyes.

SandraDodd.com/connections/design
photo by Holly Dodd, of the mountains, sunshine and flags
we see every day in Albuquerque

Something different

Things you are used to are exotic to others. There are things you see every day that some people might never, ever see in person.

Lightning storms. Snow. Kangaroos. Tumbleweeds. Tugboats. Mountains. Beaches. Cargo bikes. Lifts / elevators. Temples. Shave ice. Castles. Cactus. Alligators.

Inventory your special local treasures!

SandraDodd.com/museum
photo by Sandra Dodd
(click it for a video)
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Secondary benefits

Look at all this impermanence—pixels showing a digital photo of the shadows of paper banners. Nothing very solid. Nothing that will last a century. But when you share an observation with a child, or with a friend, it is possible that you will be offering a missing piece, an inspiring opening, a near-magical life-changing clue.


What seems small to one person might be life changing to another.

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The text above was written for the image, but here's an example:
SandraDodd.com/mylittlepony
photo by Sandra Dodd

Building trust

"When your words and your actions are in alignment, that's when you're building trust." —Pam Laricchia

Pam's words came in this interview, at 23:15
photo by Janine

Up and above

Negativity will weigh you down and make life heavy. Hope and optimism will help you float up and above.

SandraDodd.com/abundance
photo by Abby Davis
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Right where you are

If every conscious decision is taken with the intention of getting closer to the way one wants to be, then in a "getting warm / getting cold" way, it's not nearly as distant as one might have thought. You never even have to leave your regular house, car, family. It's right where you are, only the thoughts are different.

SandraDodd.com/factors
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Next week, next year, next century

People DO think of next week. They think of last week. But they're doing their thinking from inside their present selves.

Balance depends on the fulcrum. Be solid. Be grounded.
Be whole, and be here.

SandraDodd.com/peace/becoming
photo by Sandra Dodd

Wisdom

Rejoice when your child surpasses you in skill, knowledge or wisdom.

Nearly a quote, from SandraDodd.com/empowerment
photo by Sandra Dodd

"Just now"

from a talk on May 9 (2015) about choices,
finding balance, and living in the present moment:

"Just right" and "just now" are things you should pay attention to.

SandraDodd.com/moment
photo by Holly Dodd, of bubbles in India
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Make it ALL learning!

If a person's life is compartmentalized into learning and not learning, then they have a part of them that is "not-learning."

"Not learning"
photo by Sandra Dodd
(click to enlarge)

Explore close by

There might be something near you that's interesting, pretty, different, unusual, that's worth a little visit. Don't wait to be tourists in distant lands to have a look around!

Strewing in Action
photo by Colleen Prieto

Be abundantly supportive.

It is possible for someone to see through a lens of negativity. Pessimism and cynicism can do irreversible damage to relationships, so dismantle those if you're living with them in you. In your choice making, in your moments, choose to see the good side of each coin. Decide to see what you have, with eyes of gratitude. See the abundance around you. Be abundantly supportive. Be someone another will be grateful for.

SandraDodd.com/betterpartner
photo by Janine (it's a link)
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