
Being a good parent is not martyrdom. It's this: Being (in essence, in life, in thought, in action) a good (not bad, not average, but quality/careful/positive) parent.
Becoming the Parent You Want to Be is a fair match.
photo by Belinda Dutch
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Anytime an unschooling mother thinks she's not doing enough, the simple solution is for her to do more. | ![]() |
![]() | "Mostly our unschooling journey is unfolding beautifully using the guiding principles I learned from this group. Just Add Light and Joyce’s unschooling cards are my daily resource treasures." —Megan Valnes * |
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Every choice you make should be made consciously, thoughtfully, for real and good reasons. | ![]() |
![]() | Our house is really very peaceful. A house full of "no" can't begin to be this peaceful. |
It's not good for a family that's had rules to drop them suddenly. It confuses the kids, and robs the mom of a hundred chances to go "Hmmm.... Sure! Why not?" and keeps the kids from those hundred joyous moments. Better to move toward it somewhat gradually, humorously and merrily than to just say one day "Eat anything and everything, and never go to sleep." That's not comfortable. | ![]() |
When you choose, clean, cut and set food down, be there. Sometimes, consider the texture, color and shapes. A few minutes spent seeing more clearly, and moving more purposefully, might make memories for those who see your momentary artistry, and will give you a moment of presence and success. | ![]() |
When you look up, literally or figuratively, life is better than when you're stuck looking down. The air, the light, the expansive sky, are not down under your feet. Look way up, and smile. | ![]() |
![]() | Think of something that could make a child's life better. Act on that thought. |
![]() | The cool thing about partners is, if they win you win. |
![]() | The sun I see today will be the same sun you all see. In Maharashtra, in East Sussex, in New Mexico, the horizon is different but the sun is the same. |
The way to be an unschooler is to change the way you see and think, so that you can change the way you act and react. | ![]() |
Caren Knox wrote:
In addition to this time being short, and precious, you are building the foundation of natural learning in your home. Learning flows when needs are met, connections are strong, and kids can absolutely trust their parents, and know their parents are there for them. Some of the core values of natural learning are trust, support, joy, and freedom. You are putting up scaffolding for years and years of learning by the choices you make now.
![]() | Give your kids so much love and self-confidence that peer pressure will mean nothing to them. They will be pressure-proof. |
Peace and calm help learning. Stress and pressure never help learning. If you set your priority on learning and peace, it makes other questions easier. |
![]() | If you think of knitting as “good for learning math” it isn’t good for knitting. 🙂 EVERYthing is good for learning everything. |
When trying to decide whether unschooling is working, remember to compare it to what would be going on if your kids went to school. They’d be doing six different things (homework) not of your choosing or theirs. And you would be expected to oversee/help. They would have been taught by school NOT to fraternize with others; they would be less likely to play together. So don’t compare it to your imagined ideal. Compare it to other real options, and then appreciate what you have. | ![]() |
What makes unschooling work is that children learn by playing. Older kids too. Adults, too. People learn by playing. People can learn without “work” and “study.” They can learn by trying, discussing, exploring. | ![]() |