Fear can fade

New unschoolers are often afraid. They're afraid to keep doing what they're doing; they're afraid to change. Sometimes to calm someone I have said "It's not like moving to Mars. You will still live in the same house. You'll still be sitting in that same chair."

Something that allayed my fears when I had babies still works years later. When I'm fearful or worried, it helps to smell the top of my child's head. If you find a natural opportunity to hold or hug or bend over your child, inhale the scent of his head, slowly. Don't worry if it's an unbathed eleven year old. Just do it with love and gratitude, and you might find yourself in that moment, touching your child gently, remembering who you are and where you are.



To help people step past and rise above their fears: Overcoming Fear

Find the fun

Find the fun and see the beauty.



SandraDodd.com/gratitude
photo by Cathy Koetsier

Intangible gifts

For many families, this can be a time of stress and love and joy and exhaustion and fear of failure, concerning procurement and presentation of food or presents.

Remember intangible gifts. Remember to be kind and quiet and sweet, around and through the sound and swirl. Be grateful and express your gratitude to others, for help, for health, for being, for smiles, and for love. Touch and speak gently.

Gifts
photo by Meghan Pawlowski
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See what you have

The difference between poverty and abundance is sometimes the ability to see what one has. There have been times when I didn't have a car, we had a leaky roof, and the washing machine wasn't working. There have been more times that the car and washing machine were functioning, the house was solid, and I forgot to appreciate it.

from Gratitude, page 213 of The Big Book of Unschooling
(page 185, first edition)
photo by Elise Lauterbach

Harvest

Fewer folks farm than used to. It's understandable.

Even without a farm, though, what's planted might grow. What is tended thrives.

Not everything can be controlled, but many things can be accepted and appreciated. Mentally gather up the positive results in your life and be grateful for your harvest.


SandraDodd.com/gratitude
photo by Lydia Koltai
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Positive, inspired, happy

Ripandeep Saran wrote:

When I was 14 years old, I asked the leader of the Sikh ashram I was visiting what to do when I am feeling blue and he told me the scriptures advise meditation, service and giving gratitude. He told me that it is also the same advice for when you are happy.

This all helps me keep my cup full. That is what works best for me - keeping my cup full of positive, inspired, happy energy as much as possible. Life has its ups and downs, but I like to focus more on the ups and put myself in the best possible position to help myself out when I am down. I am more sensitive than most people, and I feel very deeply. If I had not learned early in life how to deal with my lows, life might not have been as wonderful as it has been.

—Ripandeep Saran
(a.k.a. Rippy Dusseldorp)

The quote is from SandraDodd.com/mentalhealth2

but I also saved it at SandraDodd.com/cup
photo by Marta Venturini

Richness in details

"Sometimes the simplest details lead to more mindful living. The richness of abundant living is in the details."

—Ren Allen

SandraDodd.com/gratitude
photo by Sandra Dodd, of a tree made of plastic water bottles
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Receiving Light by mail...

Some of you should be seeing an improved mailing. Our replacement for the longtime "feedburner" was not as clean or as pretty as Just Add Light and Stir needs. Having heard what I liked, wanted, and wished for, Vlad Gurdiga has created his own subscription system.

One hundred subscribers have been moved to the new program as a test. I missed this year's anniversary (September 2), but Just Add Light and Stir is over 11 years old now! Thank you for reading, and I hope that soon every subscriber will have a more beautiful e-mail to open each day.

Without Vlad's generous help, much of our long-collected unschooling information would be unavailable. I'm very grateful.

Gratitude
photo by Tara Joe Farrell

Simple beauty

If you can see the beauty in plain and simple things, the world will be more beautiful.

SandraDodd.com/gratitude
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Moments of growth

Some moments seem more important than they are. Other moments are more important than they seem.

We can't guarantee or control much, in the world, so look for the good, and look for the growth.

A moment of peace and sweetness cannot be recreated. Perhaps new ones can be induced, though!

SandraDodd.com/gratitude
photo by Elaine Santana
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Abundance and gratitude

"If it's not one thing, it's another."

People usually say that of problems or frustrations. But what about gourds, and little girls, and music, and humor?

If you practice finding abundance, if it's not one thing, it will be another.

SandraDodd.com/abundance
photo by Cátia Maciel
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A step toward joy

Some of the things that help people be confidently in the moment, feeling satisfied and content are:

• Breathing
  
• Gratitude
  
• Happy thoughts
  
• Fondness
  
• Acceptance

At first it might be relief and not joy, but as relief is a step away from fear, more relief will be progress toward joy.

The Big Book of Unschooling, page 275 (or 318)
photo by Ester Siroky
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Lighter and brighter

The more people who can lighten up, the lighter and brighter the world will be.

SandraDodd.com/gratitude
(The quote is not from there, but it's a good page.)
photo by Sandra Dodd

Softer emotions

Ren wrote:

Anytime I feel resentment building up I try to look at the activity or situation in the light of death. If the one I loved were gone, cleaning up after them or reminding them of something for the thousandth time might seem endearing, rather than irritating.

—Ren Allen

SandraDodd.com/gratitude
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Be it

Be the kind of person you want your child to be.

Nurture your own curiosity and joy.

Find gratitude and abundance in your life.

SandraDodd.com/video/doright
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Habits

When it starts to become a habit for a parent to consider peace, safety, acceptance, choices, service and gratitude in everyday decision making, parenting gradually becomes easier.



SandraDodd.com/betterpartner
photo by Sandra Dodd

A wonderful, surprising abundance

Megan Valnes, when her daughter was younger, wrote:

Today, while making my older daughter's bed, I was reflecting on the very act itself. The girls have a bunk bed and Lila's is on the top, so I have to climb up there and she has about 20 stuffed animals--it's what I would have used to think of as a pain. Instead of feeling overworked and underpaid as I made her bed, I found myself taking extra care to make her bed very nicely because I know how good it feels to sleep in a freshly made bed. I tucked the sheets and blankets in tight and cleaned off any food crumbs. Thinking of my sweet girl, I made the bed as perfectly as I thought she would like. Her stuffed animals are placed in their special places and her bed looks very cozy and inviting. Even if she never mentions it (which I doubt she will), I feel good knowing she will appreciate the gesture.

Is this the abundance everyone talks about? This fullness of heart that I no longer think of making beds as a chore, but as an act of service and gratitude? The feeling was such a wonderful surprise!

—Megan Valnes

SandraDodd.com/service
photo by Cass Kotrba

Curiosity and Joy

Be the kind of person you want your child to be. Nurture your own curiosity and joy. Find gratitude and abundance. Explore. Make connections, on your own.

SandraDodd.com/video/doright (video and transcript)
or maybe They just like it.
photo by Kristy Hinds
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Breathe and smile

Who you are, no one else can be.

Who you are now is not who you were before. Who you are today is not who you will be tomorrow.

Breathe and smile and step toward your future.

SandraDodd.com/gratitude
photo by Elise Lauterbach ___

"Thank you"

A good project for this season: Maybe send a thank-you note.
Not to me.

Send a thank-you note to someone who has helped you this year, or maybe deliver one by hand to the nicest person at your grocery store, or a neighbor who smiles and waves.

Maybe someone has been nice to you online, and you could send an e-mail or a facebook message.


SandraDodd.com/gratitude
photo by Sandra Dodd
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