Arts and sciences

Art, engineering, form and function. See beauty not only in exotic or historical things, but also in newer, serviceable objects. Even brooms and dustpans are designed and created to be attractive and serviceable. Some art is seasonal and fleeting. Does someone in your family wrap gifts beautifully? Make beautiful cookies?

Everyday Art
photo by Broc Higgins

Conditions

Conditions change for many reasons. Comfort levels vary.

Even one small improvement can positively affect a moment, a mood, a person, a family.

SandraDodd.com/nest
photo by Karen James
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Visits

Visits make memories. I still remember places I visited when I was very young. I recall things I ate, saw, heard, discovered, and learned. The houses and places are like characters in the book of me.

For everyone who has hosted my kids when I wasn't there, I'm grateful. They have memories of many things I didn't see.

My life is richer for visits as an adult, being able to see architecture in neighborhoods unlike my own, happy homey artistry and collections of everyday things, oddities, back yards and gardens.

Take your kids visiting. Have guests. What is small and routine for you might last forever in them.

Unschooling Very Well
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Clarity and focus

Clarity and focus make things easier.

Muddly confusion make things harder.

SandraDodd.com/clarity
photo by Janine Davies

Preserve joy

With kids in the house, wanting mom's positive attention, the creation and preservation of joy provides a better environment for the whole family.

SandraDodd.com/perspective
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Helpful and supportive

I have suggested to parents of infants to imagine that a child comes with a book of coupons for saying "No" 200 times (pick a number; I've said 300 before, too). That is how many times a parent can say "No," and the child really listen.

So it's good not to use them all up in the first year or two, because the child won't hear you anymore. It's good to save a few dozen for when they're teens and it's crucial.

To extend that to marriage, how many hateful statements can a relationship endure? How many fights will crack the foundation? Keep hate out of your house. Only say helpful, supportive things.

Parents who wouldn't dream of telling a child he is stupid seem not to notice saying similar things to that child's other parent. Don't be hateful, and save your fights for very important things in the distant future. (If the rest of this goes well, you might never need those.)

SandraDodd.com/betterpartner
photo by Cátia Maciel

Mom in the middle

The mom is in the middle. She's the pivot point, the center, the way in which all these people are related.


A mom was worried about being in the middle, in a situation involving her husband and four children.

Being a Happy Mom
has other encouragement for moms.
photographer unknown, but the mom is "jakesmom"/Vicki
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