Water

I asked my daughter for an idea for Just Add Light, and she said "water."


Holly has played in small water and large, and suggested I recommend water play for its soothing effects, and for being one of the least expensive materials for exploration and entertainment. Bowls, pans and measuring cups. Water in sand or dirt. Showers and bathtubs. Wading pools. Ice makes a good floating toy. Ice cubes, or ice frozen into a mold, a pan, or a plastic bag will not need to be cleaned up or put away later. Ice in a wading pool. Ice in a sand box. Ice in a toy dump truck.

There was a time when Holly took two or three baths a day, just to be in the water, playing with a wash cloth, a colander, a funnel and some cups. She would listen to music and sing.

When our kids were very young, we would put a thick towel on the patio, set out shallow pans of water, little cups and bowls, and let the baby pour and splash.

For older kids and adults, a float or a swim, if possible, or some new soap and a long shower can make a difference in mood and moment.

Letting water run over your hands, feeling the smooth, gentle flow can move you toward peace.



photos by Sandra Dodd

SandraDodd.com/water (←that page is newer than this post)
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Sun and water

Something we have in common with our most ancient ancestors, and our most distant cousins, is our need for water and sunlight.

For fun (and for learning, but don't think so much about that part), maybe let that be the theme of your thoughts and connections for an hour, or a day. Wheat and trees, birds and bugs, ice and steam, waterfalls and deserts, all can be considered and compared.

Some things must be wet, so it's a good thing there's water. Others need to stay dry, and the sun helps with that.

Make a happy game of exploring ideas.


SandraDodd.com/water
photo by Janine Davies
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Sweeter water

Water handed to you nicely is a lot nicer than water slammed at you and sloshed.

It's got to be better for you, because you can drink it calmly and sweetly, without trying to choke it down when you feel like you're going to cry.

Be gentle.

SandraDodd.com/eating/peace
(The quote about water is from
Partnerships and Teams in the Family.)
photo by Sandra Dodd
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A drop of water

Karen James took this photo, and wrote of it, "A forest in a drop of water."

It reminded me of this, from "Disposable Checklists for Unschoolers":

Universe-in-a-Drop-of-Water Method: Can one intense interest come to represent or lead to all others? A mom once complained that her son was interested in nothing but World War II. There are college professors and historians who are interested in nothing but World War II. It can become a life's work. But even a passing interest can touch just about everything—geography, politics, the history and current events of Europe and parts of the Pacific, social history of the 20th century in the United States, military technology, tactics, recruitment and propaganda, poster art/production/distribution, advances in communications, transport of troops and food and supplies, espionage, prejudices, internment camps, segregation, patriotism, music, uniforms, insignia, religion....

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Karen took a photo of a forest and of unschooling in a drop of water.

SandraDodd.com/checklists
photo by Karen James
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Clouds and water

Clouds and water are two forms of the same material. Water can reflect clouds, too. Clouds can cast shadow on water.

There won't be a test, but sometimes consider how other things can be "the same," yet very different. Our perceptions depend on light, angles, our own knowledge and history. What you see isn't everything. What you know is smaller than the whole.

Be open to beauty and joy.

A Different Angle
photo by Jen Keefe
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In the moment

Pam Sorooshian wrote:

There are times in life that you won't feel like you can take care of others around you as well as you'd like. You need nurturing yourself and other people's neediness starts to be draining on you.

I've felt that, too.

But I've also found that if I focus more on "seeing" my kids with loving-eyes focus, consciously choose to pay attention to what I love about them, then I actually begin to feel more nourished and strengthened by them, and by the very acts of caring for them.

Partly what is so draining is that your mind is on other things while your kids want your attentiveness on them. So you feel pulled and that is stressful. If you can, try to stop thinking about the other stuff and focus on the little details of what you're doing at the moment. If your child wants pasta at midnight (just happened here), then you go put the water in the pot and put it on the stove. While you're doing that, concentrate on feeling the coldness of the water, the heaviness of the pot as it fills with water. Hear the sound of the water running.

It is late and I'm not being as articulate as I'd like—but what I'm saying is to practice being totally "in the moment" by noticing every sensation—sound, touch, smell, etc. Especially do this in regard to your children—touch them, smell them, listen to the sound of their voices, and so on.

Even if you only manage to get into this heightened state of mind for a minute or two at a time, do it as often as you think of it throughout your day. Each minute will be refreshing—it is a form of meditation that you can do while you're going about your daily activities.

—Pam Sorooshian

SandraDodd.com/breathing
photo by Janice Casamina Ancheta

Reflections

Reflections are beautiful to see—in still water, in windows, or mirrors.

If there are waves on the water, or leaves, or plants, or ice, the reflections might not be as clear. If a glass surface is wavy, or curved, or broken, the reflection will be distorted. Sometimes that's fun.


People "reflect on things," cognitively, mentally. The plainer one's mind and thoughts are, the easier it will be to reflect.

Looking back
photo by Orion Larson

Signs and other excitement

A mom once wrote:

We left the house and headed to the subway, (we live in Manhattan). On the way there, Logan spotted a number of street signs. He commented on their shapes and colors, he gets very excited by this. We got to the subway, and he said we were taking the "A" train, so we sang the song together. At 14th Street there is an elevator to get out of the subway, so he talked about going up and down. We were headed downtown to a really fun water playground. He had a blast playing in the water, filling up a cup and spilling it out. He also practiced his climbing to get to the big curly slide. Logan also got to socialize with lots of kids of many different ages. Sometimes that takes some negotiating...he's learning. After a few hours we headed back home.

When we got off of the train, Logan wanted to go to Central Park, which we call our back yard. There is a small lake near us, and he loves to look at the ducks. We watched the ducks; he counted sticks and threw them in the water, looked at trees, flowers and squirrels. Sometimes we see Raccoons too. As an added bonus, there was a troop of actors performing Shakespeare. There was sword fighting, so Logan wanted to watch the show. . . . .I never had this much fun, or got so much out of a day in school. —Meryl, Logan's mom

A Great Day
photo by Sandra Dodd, of a sign in Austin, not Manhattan
click for clarity
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Oranges and water

There have been a couple of discussions in which people said strewing was manipulative and sneaky. I don't see it that way at all. If I know what kinds of things my children could use being exposed to to be more well rounded, or to "fill in gaps" in what they know, or to take them to another level of understanding, bringing those things up in physical or conversational ways is no more "manipulative" than bringing more fruit into the house if there hasn't been much fruit consumption lately, or bringing them bottles of water on hot summer days. I don't need to force them to eat oranges or drink water, but I can notice it might be good for them and make it appealing.

SandraDodd.com/strew/how
photo by Sandra Dodd
of a picture of a steam engine
on a steam engine
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Philosophical cookies

What makes "a watermelon cookie"? These didn't taste like watermelon. They weren't made of watermelon. The term here is all about their appearance.

Watermelon is usually considered to be healthy, but tourists and host families in India are reminded that if someone should not drink "the local water," that they should also avoid watermelon, as that fruit takes in and stores some of the potentially dangerous (to visitors) elements of local water.

These cookies have nothing to do with India, or with bad water, except wait.... I just connected them, in a way.

Some parents might cringe (or worse) at the idea of my joy in something involving sugar and food coloring, but as I'm already talking about memories and connections, I can remind readers that parental disapproval (especially when it's overblown or overstated) does more damage than sugar-coated food-colored sugar with chocolate chips ever could.

I learned the watermelon cookie recipe from a younger friend, when she asked me if I could make them for her wedding reception. I did. She had horses. My daughter, who was eight years old or so and learning to braid, was able to help groom and braid the mane of one of those horses, and work some ribbons in there somehow. Later she did that with people, and My Little Ponies.

My granddaughter wasn't born when all that happened, but now she has helped make those cookies. She might never meet Sarah, who had watermelon-cookie memories from her own childhood.

Connections and memories involve people, places, newnesses, learning, amusement, trivia, and thoughts about the meaning of life, and of reality. The more naturally people can see and appreciate those things, the better life and learning will be.


Report on the making of watermelon cookies
Photos by Sandra Dodd—
this one is a link:

Using tools

When I was a kid, humans used tools and that made us human, but that's no longer "the truth." Chimpanzees can use a leaf as a sponge to gather water out of a hole. They will lick a stick and put it down a hole to collect insects (termites? ants? I don't know what). They will move things to climb up on to get something they can't reach.

Marty says he thinks maybe elephants will pick up a stick to knock something down that's higher than their trunks. If they haven't, they should.

So what, these days, are "tools"? My computer? Google? Wikipedia? Blogger.com? My new glasses? That electric teakettle I'm about to go and heat water with?

We talk about parenting tools, and people adding to their toolboxes, and those are all in the realm of thought (and action proceeding from thought, but without physical tools).

"Tools" (on the Thinking Sticks blog)

Little Tools for an Epic Life
photo by Amy Milstein

Sand and water

Play with sand and water. Find seeds. Sit in the shade, and in the sun. Set ice in the shade and in the sun. Write with ice on a sunny sidewalk.

SandraDodd.com/substance
photo by Janine

In a drop of water

Universe-in-a-Drop-of-Water Method:

Can one intense interest come to represent or lead to all others? A mom once complained that her son was interested in nothing but World War II. There are college professors and historians who are interested in nothing but World War II. It can become a life’s work. But even a passing interest can touch just about everything—geography, politics, the history and current events of Europe and parts of the Pacific, social history of the 20th century in the United States, military technology, tactics, recruitment and propaganda, poster art/production/distribution, advances in communications, transport of troops and food and supplies, espionage, prejudices, interment camps, segregation, patriotism, music, uniforms, insignia, religion....

from "Disposable Checklists for Unschoolers"
photo by Roya Dedeaux

Water play

Remember these moments, when simple things make the normal world magical.

Provide for the possibility of these moments.

SandraDodd.com/water
photo by Janine Davies
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Light, or joy

Several weeks ago, I requested photos that had "something to do with light, perhaps, or joy."

Thirty-four people sent at least two photos. Some sent more. Nearly a third of those had a similar photo—water play, usually in waves, near a shore.

I hadn't thought that there might be a predominant, iconic image of light and joy, but I think playing in water might be it!

The second most frequent theme was snuggling, or carrying another person. Sometimes it was parent and child, and other times siblings.

In third place for repeats was Lego!

Andrea Justice's set of five photos included a beach AND Lego!

You'll be seeing more of all of those over the next few months, and thank you all for letting us peek into the light and joy of your lives.

SandraDodd.com/joy
photo by Shannon Loucks
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Is unschooling too big a gamble?

Would school seem like less a gamble to you?
Would buying a curriculum seem like less a gamble?
Moving to a fancier neighborhood, or to a country not involved in any wars?

I cannot make my children's lives good. I can't ensure their success. I cannot make a tree grow. I can water it and put a barrier near so Keith doesn't hit it with a lawnmower, and ask my kids not to climb in it while it's young.

I could destroy that tree, all kinds of ways. I could do it damage. I could neglect it. But I can't predict where the next branch will grow, or whether it will double in size this year or just do 1/3 again of its height. Not all years' growth are the same.

I could mess my kids up and make them unhappy and keep them from having access to things, but I cannot make them learn. I can't make them mature. I can give them opportunities and room to grow, and food and water and a comfortable bed.

I can't guarantee anything for anyone else, nor for my own family. I know what does damage, and I know what might help.


from the page "Huge Gambles (or small gambles)"
SandraDodd.com/guarantee
photo by Holly Dodd
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Autumn waterfall

Leaves changing, water flowing—visible signs of the natural passage of time.

I'm glad Gail and Broc hiked to this beautiful place and Gail captured an image.

The water's flowing even if nobody's watching.

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Waterfalls
photo by Gail Higgins

Stages of Unschooling

The first stage is all the fear and uncertainty and angst.

Then comes deschooling and noticing how much of one's thoughts might be school-based and how easy it is for adults to belittle and discount children. That will take a year or so.


After school starts to recede it will be like the stars showing on a clear dark night in the country. They were always there, but you couldn’t see them for the glare of the sun or the city lights. So now you'll start to see that they're not all the same, and there are patterns, and a history, and there's science, mythology, art, and then the moon comes out! And then you hear coyotes and owls and water moving somewhere… what water?

It might be like that, or it might be exactly that. But until you stop doing what you were doing before, you will not see those stars.

After a few years of reveling in natural learning and the richness of the universe, if you or your children decide to take a class it will be an entirely different experience than you would have had when school loomed so large in your vision of the world.

That's all of page 37 (or 40) of The Big Book of Unschooling,
which leads to SandraDodd.com/stages
photo by Sandra Dodd
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The universe in a drop of water

Universe-in-a-Drop-of-Water Method:

Can one intense interest come to represent or lead to all others? A mom once complained that her son was interested in nothing but World War II. There are college professors and historians who are interested in nothing but World War II. It can become a life’s work. But even a passing interest can touch just about everything—geography, politics, the history and current events of Europe and parts of the Pacific, social history of the 20th century in the United States, military technology, tactics, recruitment and propaganda, poster art/production/distribution, advances in communications, transport of troops and food and supplies, espionage, prejudices, interment camps, segregation, patriotism, music, uniforms, insignia, religion....



from "Disposable Checklists for Unschoolers"
Disposable Checklists for Unschoolers
photo by Gail Higgins

Surrounded by generosity

Pam Sorooshian wrote:

When I get up and get a glass of water for my child, while I'm filling the glass, I imagine that cool water going into their mouth and down their dry throat and how cool and sweet that feels to them—how their thirst is being quenched. And I very very often give them the glass along with a kiss on the top of the head or at least a smile.

Being generous in a zillion little ways surrounds the kids with generosity. That's the environment I wanted to create.

—Pam Sorooshian

SandraDodd.com/generosity

(the original writing was on facebook)
photo by Sabine Mellinger