Flowing play

One of my guiding principles is that I want my children's worlds to be sparkly. There goes the dull and the darkness. Easily not chosen, not an option.

SandraDodd.com/unschool/sparkly
photo by Julie D, in Leiden, at a playground
also seen here: Clearer and larger

The path to peace

"One of the biggest shifts in my unschooling journey has been changing my focus—staying in the present, letting go of the need to have things match my expectations (or those of the school world around me), relaxing my grip on What The Future Is Going To Bring. Letting go of the need to control the results is the path to living peacefully, because it keeps me oriented to The Process, to living mindfully in the present."

—Leah Rose

SandraDodd.com/moment
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Polite and confident

"Lead by example. Be polite and confident, show trust and respect to those who deserve it and your kids will do the same."

—Lyle Perry

SandraDodd.com/lyle/list
photo by Sandra Dodd

Bigger, wiser, more whole

Giving children choices helps create a partnership, it helps them learn, it makes them bigger, wiser, more whole.

Pulling them out or pushing them into things keeps them smaller and more powerless.

SandraDodd.com/respect
photo by Sandra Dodd

Choices, for partners

When you choose to say something or to wait, think of which will be more patient, or less critical. If you decide to say something, think of two things and choose the one that is closer to the person you want to be. If you choose not to say anything, consider your posture and demeanor. Choose to be gentle, and not to express negative emotion.

Sometimes choose quiet space, but not hateful silence.

With practice, it gets easier.


SandraDodd.com/betterpartner
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Be inviting

In response to someone saying "I pulled her out of school…", I wrote:

Being pulled out of something sounds rough, and surprising, and a tad violent.

Being invited to come home is much sweeter, and gives the child an option and some power.

(That will work for any choice you can give a child to come home,
opt out, take a break from some activity.)

SandraDodd.com/peace
photo by Rippy Dusseldorp
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One peaceful choice

Lisa J Haugen wrote:

I make one peaceful choice, one bonding, relationship-building choice. Just one little choice. Then it's easier to make the next one, and the next one, and sometimes there's wobble, but rebuilding peace and self esteem one choice, one moment at a time, is doable! When you do that you can get to really sweet, joyful, soul-warming places.

—Lisa J Haugen

SandraDodd.com/choices
photo by Sandra Dodd