Leaning toward balance

On finding balance:

Lean by thoughts and decisions.
Lean toward what you understand, and what makes sense.

Too far? Lean back.
Just right? Do more with your children, while you're in that state.

SandraDodd.com/balance
photo by Sandra Dodd; Castle of the Moors, in Portugal

"Do we have to learn this?"

My children have never asked, "Do we have to learn this?" They don't have to learn anything. So everything is equally fun for them. The joy of unexpected discovery is the substance of a typical unschooling day.

SandraDodd.com/presidents
photo by Marty Dodd

Make room in your heart

Be your child's friend.

Make room in your heart and your life and your house for your child and his interests.

SandraDodd.com/focus
photo by Julie D

Changing gears

Deschooling is like changing gears. Go slowly. Go deliberately. SandraDodd.com/gradualchange Don't goof around. Don't stall. SandraDodd.com/doit How can both be true? The clutch and the gas.

photo by Sandra Dodd, recently
coloring by Holly Dodd, years ago
light switch plate by Sandra, years ago
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Secret recipe?

Kelly Lovejoy wrote once, in a lively discussion:

I think (almost) *everyone* would like kind, respectful, generous, polite children. I just think they haven't found the recipe yet.
We have!


I responded:

Yes!!
But when I try to tell them, their next thought is that Marty must be just an exceptional human to whom the regular "truths" don't apply.

So few people have seen a person who's not so scarred by social business-as-usual life that they can't imagine it. We've seen it but others don't believe us.

SandraDodd.com/money
photo by Liam, a houseguest
Footnote to what's above: There are other factors, and not all unschoolers get exceptionally generous children, but when the parents adopt those positive traits and live lovingly, they provide the possibility.

Nurturing our spirit

"[W]e are drawn to exploring ourselves, to finding that depth of engagement in life, with all its twists and turns and ups and downs. For maybe the first time we really see the value in nurturing our spirit. It stuns us. We marvel that the journey we started to fully and deeply support our children and their learning has turned so completely around and we are learning so much from them about being alive and fully engaged with life."

—Pam Laricchia at Unschooling Grows Far Beyond “Not School"

SandraDodd.com/spirituality
photo by Colleen Prieto

I cannot begin to express my joy

Schuyler Waynforth wrote:

We have chosen to listen to our children, to pay attention to their needs and their wants instead of telling them that they must conform to our needs and our wants.


It means that for me if Simon (my 8 year old son) asks me to help him play Tales of Symphonia on the gamecube and I happen to be doing the dishes I may ask that he wait the 10 minutes or more likely than not I may just let the dishes soak and come and play with him. The dishes will be easier to clean when I empty the sink and refill it with warm water and I will have gotten to spend an hour with my son talking and exploring and playing and continuing to forge a relationship that makes me so happy I cannot begin to express my joy.

SandraDodd.com/schuyler/rant
That was from an unusual (for Schuyler) rant in 2007.

Here are some newer words from this ever-thoughtful unschooling mom:
Schuyler Waynforth Interview

photo by Sandra Dodd, of Schuyler's cat in 2009
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