Violence?

There are no "violent video games." Kids are sitting on a couch in their parents' home pushing buttons on a remote control. That's not hurting them or anyone else. (Or young adults are home sitting and pushing buttons, instead of being out drinking or vandalizing something.)

In every single case of real-life violence anyone can think of, wouldn't it have been better if the perpetrator had been home on the couch than out causing trouble? 🙂

SandraDodd.com/violence
photo by Sandra Dodd

Going backwards

"If a frustrated child is frustrating you, then find ways to eliminate things that frustrate your child."

—Jenny Cyphers

SandraDodd.com/bonding
photo by Sandra Dodd

Nurturing optimism

Pam Sorooshian, on her plans for a late-December presentation:

The one thing I've been thinking about this week is that unschooling is a profoundly optimistic decision and that it involves a huge commitment to living a very optimistic life. I'm going to talk more about what I mean by that and what happens when children grow up that way—kind of amazing.

I think it is possible that THE most significant thing unschooling does is nurture optimism.

—Pam Sorooshian

Always Learning Live Unschooling Symposium blog
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Supplies for play

Consider your resources and be on the lookout for more necessities like these: balls, flashlights, cloth for capes or tents (over tables or chairs or couches), containers, bathtub toys (ice is good), costumes, hats, blocks, magnets. Think of yourself, as a child, and what might have caught your attention. Provide for the child inside you and the current child, too!

SandraDodd.com/playing
photo by Sandra Dodd, Amsterdam airport

Candy gets dusty

Since my kids were little they could have all the Halloween candy they wanted, and since they were little that has been no problem at all, because by the time they gave away what they didn't like and traded for favorites, and saved it and shared it with kids who came over for the next few weeks, there was still candy left. I have very often found the sorting boxes (a Xerox box lid or cardboard Coke flat) months later, and one year when it was nearly Halloween again, Kirby threw out the last of the candy from the year before. (Ditto for Christmas and Easter candy, some years.)

We were confident that it was control, not access, that made kids eat, do and want "too much" before we ever considered unschooling. Others come to the idea the other way around—unschooling first and releasing other control-urges later.

Halloween Candy and Choices, or "Candy Gets Dusty"
photo by Sandra Dodd in 2002 (click for more)
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Valuing Scooby-Doo

Colleen Prieto was talking to her son Robbie, who is nine, about "Frankenstorm." Below is Colleen's account:

He thought for no more than a second, and then very excitedly told me:

"Mom, Frankenstein is not evil. People just think he's evil but he's not - he's just trying to be good even though he's failing. Even though I haven't read the book or saw the movie if they make one, I know that pretty much from Scooby Doo. So we have nothing to worry about with the hurricane if now it's Frankenstorm because Frankenstein is good. If we were supposed to be scared, then they should have picked a better name!"

Many, many times in my daily life with my son, I am reminded that there is value in so very many things—be those things Scooby Doo or Pokemon or Star Wars or Harry Potter or 1,000 other "easy to criticize" forms of media or entertainment. Life is so much more fun when you look to the happy parts, look for the good, and keep an open mind.

Scooby-Doo, Frankenstein, and a Big Storm
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Saying "yes" to Smurfs

A mom named Sara wrote:

"One episode launched a great discussion about "fairness"—whether something the Smurfs did in response to Gargamel was "fair" or not. It was a great conversation. My 8yo especially was quite animated over the whole thing, almost outraged that the "good" guys (Smurfs) were doing something she considered not good, not fair. This led my 12 year old to all kinds of questions about if the good guys do something bad to achieve a good end, is that still 'good' or not. Eventually we wound up talking about the war, Iraq, all kinds of political stuff—by then the 8 and youngers were back to watching the show, but the 12 year old is very interested in politics and world events, and it became quite a deep discussion—all from Smurfs."

Saying Yes (again)
photo by Sandra Dodd