Where the learning is

Even if you obtain the coolest tools or toys unschoolers could recommend, natural learning isn't in the toys, it's in the reltionship between the adult and child—in the freedom and peace and time to explore and to think.

JoyfullyRejoycing.com/how-unschooling-works
(The quote isn't there, but similar ideas are!)
photo by Janine

A challenge

"Unschooling becomes the ultimate challenge against modern selfishness." —Cathy

SandraDodd.com/howtocomment
(From a longer commentary on Precisely How to Unschool)
photo by Janine

Knowledge grows and changes

My strongly held belief about most things is that no one knows for sure, knowledge grows and changes, but that stress and fear are always harmful.

SandraDodd.com/
photo by Janine Davies

Dividing is divisive

"I was thinking the other day about husbands and chores and how many people I've heard say that it shouldn't be their job to pick up after their husband. I never thought of picking up my husband's things as being my cleaning up after him—I've only thought of it as cleaning our house. Does it matter whose laundry or dishes they are? Does he shovel only his own side of the driveway and leave me to climb snowbanks to get to my side of the car? Dividing things yours-and-mine, even socks, in one's internal thoughts doesn't seem to add much happiness." —Colleen Prieto

Chores, Serving others as a gift, tales of kids helping out voluntarily
(a chat transcript)
photo by Janine

Different window, different view

Different window, different view. Don't forget to look.

Quietly, just look
photo by Janine Davies

Incredibly freeing

Joyce Fetteroll wrote:

The main idea is about seeing everything we do as a choice.

What locks people in "have to" thinking is they close the doors of choices they will not for various reasons take. They often end up with only one door open and it feels like they have to take it. And they feel trapped.

. . . .
That mental shift can be incredibly freeing. A situation that looked like a box with no exits suddenly becomes a wide open field that someone is choosing to stay in.


"The main idea" referred to Thinking About "Have To"
For more context, and the part I left out: Answers and responses...
photo by Janine Davies
(sorry I didn't have "a wide open field")
__

Embracing now

Embrace your present moment instead of yearning for what you don't have. I love the saying 'the grass is always greener where you water it.'

—Clare Kirkpatrick

SandraDodd.com/metime
photo by Janine
__

Sharing time and space

Connections are the best part of learning, in unschooling, in life, for fun. But if it’s too noisy too often, a quiet moonrise over a lake will get all sound-polluted. And one person’s thoughts of beauty might be overrun by someone else’s free associations.

Gaze without speaking / Explore Connections
photo by Janine Davies

Finding learning

Finding learning in play is like the sun coming out on a dank, dark day.

---

That quote is old, and when I looked for a photo to go with it, I found one with great light (look at the rays from behind the people on the right), but no sun coming out, no day. Cool!

Learning happens at night, too.

SandraDodd.com/unschooling

http://sandradodd.com/latenightlearning
photo by Janine Davies
__

Gradually and sensibly

It's a Very Bad Idea to "start unschooling" before you know what you're doing. The more rules a family had, the more gradually and sensibly they need to move toward saying yes.

The happy ideas to go with that are at Gradual Change.
photo by Janine Davies

Respectful attention

Where is the balance between ignoring a child, and being an irritation?

Children should not be ignored. Attentively staying some distance away because a child is playing intently, and not interrupting flow—that can be a good thing. Knowing that a child is intently playing alone involves paying attention to the child.

Transcendental moments
photo by Janine Davies
___

Learning like a kid

One indication that unschooling is working, or has succeeded, is that the adults see the world with child-like eyes. It might just be occasional, at first, but as time passes, wonder should return.

SandraDodd.com/wonder
photo by Janine
__

Funny and comfortable

Make it happy and funny and comfortable and exciting so that they want to be with you. Be sparkly.

"It" could be
  - home
  - life
  - your nest
  - your children's day
  - yourself

Sparkly Unschooling
photo by Janine
__

A progression

Sylvia Woodman wrote:

One of the great gifts of reading in unschooling groups was learning to change my perspective. To stop writing off entire days. To recognize bad moments for what they were—just moments. Moments pass MUCH quicker than entire days.

I learned the value of taking a breath and making a better choice. Wouldn't you know it, our days became better, sweeter, more fun-filled.

Did I continue to mess up? Sure, but it got to be less and less. I was growing and learning right alongside my kids. I was learning to be a better parent to my unique kids.

The things I learned rippled out across my life. I became a better daughter, partner, sister, friend. Unschooling helped me become a better human.

—Sylvia Woodman

SandraDodd.com/moment
photo by Janine Davies
__

Partnering and changing

"Partnering with my children and changing the paradigm in my family—that feels like the ultimate victory to me."

—Janine Davies

SandraDodd.com/partners/child
photo by Sandra Dodd
__

Fill yourself up

Generosity makes you generous. Kindness makes you kind. Respecting others, and their ideas and their interests, makes you full of respect—respectful. These are little things that build up quickly.


SandraDodd.com/becoming
photo by Janine Davies
__

Courage? Confidence.

Courage is sometimes about making life bigger, more sparkly, about living in the world, about creating a good nest.

I think of it as confidence. They're similar. Confidence grows from the inside, though, while courage can be reckless. . . . .
When you're thinking about what unschooling can bring into your life, don't forget confidence, or courage. And do things to build that, so your children's lives and worlds expand.

Slightly edited from Building an Unschooling Nest
photo by Janine Davies

Some of all

School calls a small sliver of the world "all", and we call all of life's learning "some".


SandraDodd.com/quotes
photo by Janine Davies
__

New, improved heart

Commentary on it being bad advice for a stranger to say "follow your heart":

Coming up with a plan to logically step, step, step by step away from the dark confusion of people's childhood memories, hidden ideas, frustrations, fears... Stepping away from that into the light is a better thing to do. Eventually they may get so good at this being-more-positive that it seems like they're following their heart—but it needs to be their new, improved, mindful heart.

Unschooling Support: Extras with Sandra Dodd
photo by Janine Davies
__

Hello?

We don't know, when we meet a person, whether we'll see them again, at all, a little, a lot.

We can't always know, when we have a wish, whether its fulfillment would be good for others or ourselves.

Probaby the best thing to do is to relax and say "Hello!"


SandraDodd.com/patience
(These words aren't there, but others are.)
photo by Janine Davies
__