Better than what?

When I write and speak about people trying to be better, some balk or resist, or say "You want us to try to be better than others?"

It's personal, not competitive.

This is the better I'm talking about:

Be better than you would have been if you had not thought "I would like to be better."

SandraDodd.com/being
photo by Sandra Dodd

What if, what if, what if

When you don't know what to do, try not to do anything.

Wait a bit.    Think.

Breathe.       Smile.

---

SandraDodd.com/breathing
photo by Sandra Dodd

Be careful

Be careful. Be sweet.

That's from notes for a talk I gave once. If you want to hear me, go here:
SandraDodd.com/listen
photo by Sandra Dodd

No shoving, please

Set it out, don't try to shove it in.

That line is from small talk I gave once, to dads only. I was talking about logic—to draw it in, not to hit people with it. But "Set it out, don't try to shove it in" can apply to many things—food, interesting things, ideas, and to unschooling itself.

photo by Sandra Dodd

Remember "partnership"

Being patient and compassionate with a child who is sad or hungry or tired or maybe teething or frustrated with his friends is good. Feeling good makes you calmer and more confident. It will give you stores of calm and clarity so that you can remember that your spouse might be sad or hungry or tired, maybe aging, aching, or frustrated with his co-workers and friends.

If you have come to feel adversarial in any way toward your partner, remember "partnership." Help him or her follow interests or hobbies or to take care of collections, or to see a favorite TV show. Support his interests. Being nicer makes you a nicer person.
SandraDodd.com/betterpartner
photo by Joyce Fetteroll

Let your child be your cause

Putting your child first while you unschool is important. When your kids grow up, you could dedicate the rest of your life to only wearing used clothes and not using electricity or charge cards or an automobile, but putting token environmental gestures first in your life causes your child to become a token environmental gesture. The environment is changed imperceptibly. His life, hugely.

SandraDodd.com/perspective
photo by Sandra Dodd

Own your own

If parents retain ownership of their children's learning, the children cannot learn on their own.

SandraDodd.com/parentalauthority
photo by Sandra Dodd