How different...

"It's funny how different the world can look, when you're not so restricted in your thoughts."

—Kristen

SandraDodd.com/alwayslearning (new, at the bottom)
photo by Sandra Dodd

New and better

Lean, one choice at a time, one conscious thought at a time, until your choices and thoughts are solidly in the range where you want to be, and you no longer lean that other way so much.

Your new range of balance will involve better choices and options than your first attempts did.

Sandra, from a talk on being partners
photo by Sandra Dodd
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New truths

"A lot of learning about unschooling is unlearning a lot of stuff that you're sure is true about learning."

—Joyce Fetteroll

More by Joyce about How Unschooling Works
and the original writing, of which the line above is just the closing
photo by Sandra Dodd

Peace rules

So what's the "rule" about peace?
There's not a rule about peace.

If you want to live peacefully, make the more peaceful choice.

SandraDodd.com/peace/noisy
photo by Marty Dodd, of found art—a peace symbol made of rocks on dry, cracked desert sand

Be still

Until a person stops doing the things that keep unschooling from working, unschooling can't begin to work. It seems simple to me. If you're trying to listen for a sound, you have to stop talking and be still. Some people want to see unschooling while they're still teaching and putzing and assigning and requiring. They have to stop that FIRST. And then they have to be still. And then they have to look at their child with new eyes. If they don't, it won't happen.

SandraDodd.com/doit
photo by Marty Dodd, in Utah
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Something new

Learning comes from connecting something new to what you've already thought or known.

SandraDodd.com/connections
photo by Marty Dodd, of a salt-encrusted coke bottle in Utah
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Flow

Robin Bentley wrote:

If you can only see the obstacles, then your journey won't be easy. Be like the water, finding its way around the rocks. See the openings, the possibilities. —Robin Bentley

from a facebook discussion, but SandraDodd.com/flow follows from it, too
photo by Colleen Prieto

Whole and in the real world

If they're whole people from the beginning, a lot of those problems and stages don't even exist. They're artificial, and they have to do with school.

Sometimes people say, "Well how will your kids know how to live in the real world?"

And I say "What do you mean by 'the real world'?"
And that's a trap.🙂

17:30 on the recording of An Interview with Sandra Dodd
photo by Holly Dodd
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Science here, there and everywhere

In school, science is
"a subject."

In the real world, science is a way of seeing, and thinking. Curiosity, observation, speculation, examination, comparisions, openness to surprises, and practice with rational thinking help one learn about things seen and unseen, small and large, from a smoking volcano to a shell on a beach to an icicle in the sunshine.
SandraDodd.com/science
photo by Dylan Lewis, in Stromboli

Going backwards

"If a frustrated child is frustrating you, then find ways to eliminate things that frustrate your child."

—Jenny Cyphers

SandraDodd.com/bonding
photo by Sandra Dodd

Chip away what isn't the good part

Michelangelo said that to carve his statue of David, he just chipped away everything that didn't look like David. Or maybe he didn't say that. But clearly that's what he ultimately did. Here will be ideas to help you chip away what doesn't look like unschooling. It's not as difficult as you might think.

From "How to Screw it Up", but if you need ideas more quickly,
chip away these things: SandraDodd.com/screwitup.
photo by Holly Dodd

To be whole...

Ren Allen wrote:

One definition of "heal" in the dictionary is "To become whole and sound; return to health." What a gift we can give our children if we can just allow them to maintain their wholeness in the first place, allow their spirits to take their own form without all the constraints that traditional parenting and schooling place upon a human being.

To be whole, to be sound, balanced, joyful, curious...these are the things I wish for my children. The focus on academic topics and grades seem so irrelevant when contrasted to the really important tools for this life's journey.

Ren Allen, from the exchange at Mindful Parenting
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Hearing what we say

Hearing what we say can change us.



"If I let him..."
photo by Sandra Dodd

A better environment for learning

(About online discussions of unschooling:)

Pointing out the words people use is never a waste of time.

Showing people that they have expressed their thoughts in writing in words of their own choosing and posted them is often THE BEST, the most effective way, of moving them from the plateau of *thinking* they get it, because they can recite back the answers, and really, truly, honestly getting it in a way that creates a better environment for learning and being.

Mindful of Words
photo by Sandra Dodd

Peace

Create and maintain a peaceful environment for your child, and share in it.



SandraDodd.com
photo by Sandra Dodd

Stop the cycle now (if applicable)

It's not a quote, but it's a summary/paraphrase by Brie Jontry of part of a talk I gave in 2010. I was really amused by it. There's nothing I didn't mean, though I don't think I phrased it quite this succinctly that night. 🙂


STOP the cycle of shitty parenting NOW.

Give your child(ren) the childhood you would have wanted.

Be the dad you wish you'd had.

Dads, unschooling, issues (a new page inspired by that "quote")
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Personal healing

I've accomplished a lot of personal healing and family progress by treatingmy children the way I wish I could have been treated when I was their age. Instead of using a script from my own childhood, instead of saying what my mom or one of my teachers would have said to me, I really look at my own child and I try to say what they need to hear, what will make their life and learning easier and less stressful.

SandraDodd.com/interview (2/3 down) photo by Sandra Dodd—fossil; limestone; Austin __

Choose more

Part of Pam Sorooshians's response to the idea that unschoolers are lazy:

Ask yourself really honestly, is there something more I could be doing for my child that would enhance my child's life? If the answer is yes, then make the choice to do it. Then ask this question of yourself again and again and, each time, make the life-enriching choice. Apply this to small things and to big momentous decisions. Small things—could I make something for dinner that would be special and interesting? Did I see a cool rock on the ground outside—could I bring it in and wash it and set it on the table for others to notice. Big things—would my child enjoy traveling? Can we take a family vacation that involves exploring things my child would find interesting?

In unschooling, 'lazy' means not thinking about enriching and enhancing your child's life. You change this by doing it—one choice at a time."

—Pam Sorooshian

SandraDodd.com/lazy/parents
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Roadblock

"It's much better to be their partner than their roadblock. If you become an obstacle they'll find a way around you. Is that what you want for your relationship with your kids?"

—Joyce Fetteroll

SandraDodd.com/partners/child
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Testing some things

I'm trying to get my little-tree favicon to show in the browser windows, and need to mess with a post to do that.

ALSO, some people were having a hard time commenting on posts at the blog. Some people are responding to the e-mails (those who read by subscription), and that's fine with me; I get a direct e-mail. If you would like to leave a comment at the blog, though, please click on the title of the post (at the top of the e-mail message), and leave a comment there.

I think it's fixed. If any of you who have had a problem before or who haven't posted but have a minute to test it could at least leave a "ping" on this one, that would be appreciated. It should take anonymous comments. It will say "anonymous," but you can sign your post in the body of it, if you want to.

There are 772 subscribers today, just for a bit of update.

Sorry for the boring post. Maybe there will be another one, later. :-)

Thanks for reading!

gratuitous photo by Sandra