Growth is good

Principles are beliefs, touchstones, things a person bases decisions around.

The idea that one can't make a choice without considering two or more options isn't a principle. It's a logical fact.

The idea that choices can lead a person nearer to the way she wants to be might be the principle that growth is good and growth is possible.

SandraDodd.com/betterchoice
photo by Noor JontryMasterson

How had I done this?

Little by little, years ago, I started to see that each little idea that had changed my own family had the potential, if I could explain it clearly enough, to change another family. Just a little was enough. As more and more families shared their successes and joys, the world changed. As more information was gathered and put where others could find it, the rate of change increased.

When I was first unschooling, we waited two months for a new issues of Growing Without Schooling. There was no internet discussion at all. When that began, a few years later, it was user groups, not even e-mail or webpages yet. Today someone can get more information about unschooling in one day than existed in the whole world when my oldest was five. I'm glad to have been part of honing, polishing, clarifying and gathering those ideas, stories and examples, and keeping them where others have quick access to them.

SandraDodd.com/interviews/naturalparenting2010
photo by Lisa J Haugen
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What and Why?

The when is now, the who is you,
the where is where you are.

The remaining questions are
what are you doing, and why?

If you don't know what you're doing, it might be good to relax and reconsider. Start fresh, and with purpose.

If you don't know why you're doing what you're doing, that could be reason enough to take a break.

SandraDodd.com/5ws
photo by Lisa J Haugen

Are you positive?

Everyone has the freedom to be negative. Not everyone has thought of good reasons to be more positive.

SandraDodd.com/open
photo by Gwen Montoya

Peace is all about choices

If you want to live peacefully make the most peaceful choices. Peace is all about choices. Choose to breathe consciously. Choose understanding over ignorance. Choose to make choices. Choose awareness over oblivion. And make choices based on the principles you live by.

SandraDodd.com/choices
(Thanks to Heather Newman for quoting me, May 22, 2011.)
photo by Sylvia Woodman

Nature and construction

Nature, culture, ancient engineering, curiosity, a moment of still wonder... People love bridges. Think back to bridges from your childhood, the oldest bridges you've seen, the simplest, the most elegant. Think of memories, or images, of people and of bridges. Beauty and wondrous crossings, over water, over canyons, over little streams and ditches. I think this must be one of the most iconic motifs in human history.

a bit about bridges
photo by Annie Regan

Car keys and money

"Look for ways to be a helpful partner to your kids—you've got the car keys and the money, you can facilitate their exploration of the world."

—Deb Rossing

SandraDodd.com/attentiveparenting
photo by Ester Siroky, from inside their RV
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Safe and comfortable

Jenny Cyphers wrote:

In my own experience, I am the protector of my child. From the day each child was born, I took on the responsibility to ensure that my children were safe and comfortable and loved and supported. That didn't stop when we disagreed. It didn't stop when the stakes were high. It didn't stop just because it was a difficult part of life"

—Jenny Cyphers

SandraDodd.com/peace/noisy
photo by Amber Ivey
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Be positively Positive!

Negativity is contagious and cancels out joy and hope. Some people are just casually negative without realizing it. Their first response to anything is likely to be derisive. It's like a disease, and they infect their friends and relatives. Eye rolling, tongue-clucking, dramatic sighs... It's emotional littering. Save them for emergencies.

Seeing and Avoiding Negativity
photo by Shonna Morgan
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Arts and sciences

Art, engineering, form and function. See beauty not only in exotic or historical things, but also in newer, serviceable objects. Even brooms and dustpans are designed and created to be attractive and serviceable. Some art is seasonal and fleeting. Does someone in your family wrap gifts beautifully? Make beautiful cookies?

Everyday Art
photo by Broc Higgins

Talking less

"It was nice to be more quiet—to let things go unsaid. Not talking automatically and at length gave me more time to think about what I really wanted to say, if anything at all. I found I had fewer regrets—wishing I'd said something different or not at all. By talking less, I became a better listener too, I think." —Karen James

SandraDodd.com/quiet
photo by Sandra Dodd, outside a watermill

Changing the world

"It's human nature to justify and explain why loving parents did what they did to us. It's also human nature to try to do better for our children than our parents did for us. So those two things together create a tension (like cables on a bridge, holding it in place) that keeps the world from changing so quickly that it's unrecognizeable, but keeps it improving."

—Sandra Dodd

The quote was saved and shared by Susan May on facebook,
from a comment I wrote on a blogpost: "I turned out fine"
photo by Shonna Morgan

Not just for kids!

I've been saying "why not?" more often and it feels good! I think it's rubbing off on my husband.

. . . .
Say "yes" to saying yes!

—Kara

Read the middle of that story with a sweet example:
SandraDodd.com/joyce/yes
photo by Hinano

Supporting interests

My husband loves to support her (and my) interests. So he's made a point to find carousels for us to visit when we travel.
. . . . I know you will not be at all surprised how one simple choice to ride the carousel at the zoo has led to so many fun and interesting experiences, but it has been so wonderful for me to see it firsthand.

SandraDodd.com/connections/example
photo by Beth Lamb
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Be reliable

It will add calm, value, and solidity to your life if you're reliable, honest, and trustworthy.

SandraDodd.com/trust
(Thanks to Amber Ivey for saving a quote I could build from here.)
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Thinking and feeling

How are you thinking?
How are you feeling?

How you are thinking and feeling is how you are living and learning.

SandraDodd.com/mentalhealth
photo by Marta Venturini Machado

Facets and aspects

This morning I was playing Dixit with people I hadn't played with before. So different! The odd pictures can be many different things, and the clues given were unexpected and interesting.

This photo, by Shonna Morgan, looks like light. A harp. A sail. A bridge. Well, it IS a bridge.

A bridge can be figurative or literal, but it's a connection, and a short cut. A "real bridge" might be a log, or a traditional rope or plank bridge, or it might be an engineering marvel that brings people and places together.

See the same thing in different ways, as often as you conveniently can.

SandraDodd.com/angles
photo by Shonna Morgan

So many paths

I love the potential in this photo. There is too much to explore, but the options are up, down, through, around. It reminds me that we live in the moment that connects the past and the future.

The world is too big for anyone to see everything. History will never all be discovered or known. The best we can do for ourselves and our children is to view their surroundings with wonder and curiosity. We can help them experience small things and large, old things and new.

SandraDodd.com/decisions
photo by Sukayna
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Solid improvement

"It's human nature to justify and explain why loving parents did what they did to us. It's also human nature to try to do better for our children than our parents did for us. So those two things together create a tension (like cables on a bridge, holding it in place) that keeps the world from changing so quickly that it's unrecognizeable, but keeps it improving."

—Sandra Dodd

The quote was saved and shared by Susan May on facebook,
from a comment I wrote on a blogpost: "I turned out fine"

(backup copy)
photo by Colleen Prieto

Dark corners, lit up

"Don't let fear and worry drive your decisions and interactions with your kids, though. If you focus on joy and partnership, dark corners won't seem dark. You and your kids will be able to illuminate them together through open dialogue and trust." —Jo Isaac

SandraDodd.com/partners/child
photo by Erika Ellis