Sometimes teens need a LOT of reassurance. So just keep showing him your confidence in him at the same time that you understand and sympathize with his fears. It is sometimes harder on our unschooled kids at this age than their schooled counterparts because our kids are entering adulthood eyes wide open—they "get it" that they are moving into adult responsibilities, etc., and they are (justifiably) sometimes freaked out by it all. The schooled kids more often don't really grasp what's coming—they're just following orders, going through the expected motions. Our unschooled kids are thinking—and their thoughts can be overwhelming and scary and they can easily feel inadequate to face the future.
SandraDodd.com/teen/angst
photo by Sandra Dodd
of directional signals
on a retired London bus
This is a great post-- so much has been written about unschooling young children that getting beyond 13 is both empowering (in that I am now absolutely certain that unschooling "works") and unsettling, because my teen is going through such huge changes physically, emotionally and psychologically. You're reminding me I need to revisit the discussion board and fortify myself with some reading on teens.
ReplyDeleteI so needed to read this right now! Sometimes I "see" or understand these things better when someone else articulates them. I'm thinking, "Yes, that's it! That's what I was trying to wrap my head around." In this case you've helped pull me from my own set of fears which I now see often send me running back to schooly-type answers.
ReplyDeleteThe day this was new, someone quoted it on facebook and wrote "Today's Add Light and Stir blog post by Sandra Dodd hit me so hard! It is a quote from a post by my friend Pam Sorooshian."
ReplyDelete(Facebook memories just showed it to me again, so I'm filing it here, with the post.)