Real world

The thing I think I've seen more than anything else in some of the older unschoolers, the people who are teens who haven't been to school much or at all, is they are so whole. Their place in the world is real. They're not preparing for the possibility of applying to have a place in the world after they're grown. They are in the world. And there's something so different about that.

Unschooling and Real Learning
photo by Sarah Dickinson

"Truths" that aren't

If someone says "Without high school, one is doomed to poverty," that is a false statement. All of us probably know people who didn't graduate from high school (or its English-school-system or other equivalent) who are happy and maybe wealthy. All of us know (or have been) people who went to a university for four or ten years and ended up working side by side with people who maybe graduated from high school and maybe didn't.

SandraDodd.com/proof is a good continuation,
but the quote is from page 47 or 51 of The Big Book of Unschooling.

photo by Gail Higgins

Pleasant associations

Finding ways not to be grumpy about dishes is a good model and practice field for other choices in life.

We get our dishes from thrift stores, mostly. If one of them bugs me, it can go back to the thrift store.

Sometimes when a mom is really frustrated with doing the dishes, it can help to get rid of dishes with bad memories and connections, or put them in storage for a while. Happy, fun dishes with pleasant associations are easier to wash.

SandraDodd.com/dishes
photo by Gail Higgins

---

Parts or versions of the text above have appeared in this blog five times before. It's simple, but people forget.

Adult decisions

When a young adult has been making real decisions for years, and what their parents want is to help them think clearly and to make careful decisions based on the preferences and beliefs of the young person himself, the same old world looks very different.

Young Adults: Partners
photo by Janine

Fuel and downtime

Connie/Otherstar wrote:

Whenever we go out, I make sure that we have lots of foods available so they don't get hungry. I watch for signs of being tired because I know that when my girls get tired, they seem to lose the ability to communicate. Letting them get overtired or over-hungry and then expecting them to communicate with you and negotiate with you isn't appropriate. For that matter, it isn't good for adults.

There have been times that we have gone out and lost track of time and we have all ended up grumpy and hungry. My husband and I will stop and get food for us all. Until everybody is fed, we don't address anything. After we all eat, then we may talk. Usually, feeding everybody eliminates the problems though.

—Connie (Otherstar)

There is more. It was not easy to choose a small part
of the longer writing at Healing Presence
photo by Sarah S.

Choices add up

Small moments of peace and calm can add up to contentment. Gratitude and acceptance contribute to satisfaction. Having a warm home isn't an absolute, and it's not magic. It's the accumulation of positive choices that create a nest for humans (and their significant animal others).

SandraDodd.com/nest
photo by Roya Dedeaux

Peace and confidence

"If you answer every question with honesty you never have to be nervous about the next question because you already know the answer. Take the chance of being uncomfortable for those few minutes of honesty. It's worth the discomfort for the peace and confidence and integrity it will build in you."

—Deb Lewis

SandraDodd.com/integrity
photo by Belinda Dutch