Thursday, March 19, 2020

First aid for scary, sad days of doubt

I wrote this on March 10, 2000:

Sometimes it's kids, sometimes it's parents.

Let's list ideas for cheering up, and de-funkifying.

I love "breathe."
Whether it's jogging or breath-holding, or laughing, or spinning or meditation—whatever causes a sudden more concentrated and less thought-laden intake of oxygen is relaxing.

I like happy music or funny, familiar movies—the stuff you already know and can put on as background, which reminds you subliminally of more peaceful and carefree days.

I like comfort food, playing with ice cubes, going to the store just to buy something cold (lettuce, apples, ice cream, a small soda for all to share, special juice or fancy tea in a bottle—something cold and soothing, and no doubt this works better in the desert than it might in Minnesota this morning).

Painting—not fancy elaborate painting, but big brush strokes on big scrap paper, or a sign for the dog, or painting on a playhouse outside or something that doesn't involve stress (if it's quickly available).

Mix it up: Wear something you haven't worn for a long time. To assist a kid to do this, get out the off-season clothes and see what's not fitting, or find some funky old thing of yours and see if the kid wants it, or stop at a garage sale and get a t-shirt for a quarter or something. A new color, a new picture, some soft cotton or silk. Marty got a silk shirt at a thrift store the other day for $3. He's thrilled. Wears it like a jacket over t-shirts. Touches the sleeves a lot.

While this stuff is being done/discussed/reviewed, the depressing problem is being dispersed, forgotten, avoided. Next time the depression comes (if it does, if it's a long-term thing) the kid or parent will approach it with a more relaxed mind and calmer body.

More ideas??
. . . .
What works at your house?

Read responses with other ideas here: Conversations with Sandra Dodd


photo by Alex Polikowsky

Wednesday, March 18, 2020

Plus or minus

Every little thing a parent does goes into the plus column or the minus column. Each parent is gaining credit or losing credit.

Everything counts—words, tone, patience, generosity, interest, kindnesses and thoughts. It takes more to build your credit back up than it does to waste it, so be careful.

Credit
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Tuesday, March 17, 2020

Too good to be true?

"It sounds too good to be true, but it isn’t. Being connected is better than being controlling. Being interested is better than being bored. Being fun is more fun than not being fun!"

—Melissa Wiley

SandraDodd.com/quotes
photo by Sandra Dodd, of bowls I bought in India
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Sunday, March 15, 2020

Peace is primary


Tara Joe Farrell wrote:

Peace is THE priority in unschooling. It's primary. No amount of dropping bedtimes or food/media restrictions, no finding the yeses, no rich environment can get a family to unschooling well until someone (the at-home parent, the keeper of the nest, usually the mom) understands how to scan for peace, see where it's missing, and then find a way to let peace grow in that space. That could mean simply planting peace, but it can also mean clearing obstacles (including ourselves). Learning only, ever, thrives where there is peace.
—Tara Joe Farrell

Becoming the Parent You Want to Be
photo by Gail Higgins—rainbow on a waterfall
(click to enlarge)

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Saturday, March 14, 2020

At peace, at home

Today is different.

Well every day is different, but this week the world is trying to figure out how to pause and wait. This affects us all. Some people got quiet. Some ran around.


Two important jobs have fallen on parents. Distract children who might be afraid, or sick or restless. Needy children.


Find and share beauty and joy in familiar things—in things you can touch, hear, see, smell, taste, drink from, eat from, sit on, sleep on, tell stories about.

The links below go to previous posts that might help you be at peace, at home.

Live lightly with patience
Arts and sciences
History at your house

photos by Sandra Dodd


(Note added in January 2022: The post above was written as the Covid-19 pandemic was being announced, in many places, and lockdowns were beginning.)

Friday, March 13, 2020

Mushy happy everything

I've come to ask for a roll call on who's seeing, reading, caring. If you have this by e-mail, please respond, with at least a ping, if not a note.

The mailer-report says nobody saw this one: Constant flow of thoughts, which is too bad because there was a cool photo by Karen James of beautiful little plants growing in a crack in a lava flow. If you didn't receive that, I don't know why not, and I hope you'll take a look.

Some people object to "Mushy happy" anything, but I'm pretty sure it's better than dried-up cranky whatever, so if you want happy encouragement, stick around! If not, see if one of these guys has a daily blog for you, and best of luck.




Wednesday, March 11, 2020

Learning curve

The learning curve of unschoolers has a plateau in the middle, it seems. Don't worry.



SandraDodd.com/learningcurve
photo by Belinda Dutch
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