SandraDodd.com/gamble
photo by Ester Siroky
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We have made good use of making patterns in the slots of a revolving rack of poker chips, and then with poker chips out on the table. I have set out photocopied pictures and cheap water colors, lots of brushes, and had side-by-side painting by the hour. Whichever kids or visitors wander by will be drawn in and as they play or paint they talk and share and think. |
"Think well of them, all the time. Be grateful." —Schuyler Waynforth about partners, but it works for kids |
Each child, in the moment, doing something interesting in the presence of a loving parent... that works the same for anyone. |
If you notice you're angry or complaining, back away a bit, physically or mentally or emotionally, and see how big the problem really is, from a different perspective. |
Nature, culture, ancient engineering, curiosity, a moment of still wonder... People love bridges. Think back to bridges from your childhood, the oldest bridges you've seen, the simplest, the most elegant. Think of memories, or images, of people and of bridges. Beauty and wondrous crossings, over water, over canyons, over little streams and ditches. I think this must be one of the most iconic motifs in human history. |
Moments of quiet focus, and photo evidence of those, are both a bit magical. |
"Treat her like a fun person rather than like a kid." —Angela (NYCitymomx3) |
There is a "when" and a "where" to activities. Soon, at my house, we'll be inside trying to stay cool, but a different latitude or hemisphere could change that. Are plants coming or going? Or maybe you live where the plants last all year, every year; maybe you live where plants are mostly indoor houseplants. Share these ideas with your children, if they're interested. I remember that a year seemed forever, when I was six years old. At sixty, time was very different. |
Every ghost town used to be alive. Every "haunted house" was once new. An abandoned car started with good tires, a running engine, and a happy owner. Each adult was a child. |
Even in New Mexico, it can be difficult to see a roadrunner. They don't live in groups and they don't make much noise. A person might live in Texas for a long time and not see a live armadillo. Don't worry if you miss seeing something cool, but be grateful for lucky sightings of mystery or beauty. Something normal near you might be exotic everywhere else. |
"As I've gotten older, I focus more and more on kindness. I want to be kind, I want my children to be kind and I want them to be in a world that is kinder." —Jenny Cyphers |
Kids have their whole childhoods to learn to tie shoes, wipe ass, make a sandwich. Parents do NOT have that whole childhood to slowly mosey over toward being a little closer to unschooling. If you don't do it soon and well, it will be too late to do it at all. |
What you know can be added to, or amended, but rarely deleted. Some people do try to encapsulate ideas or experiences and forget them. Sometimes other memories are shut off along with that. That’s a good reason for analyzing traumatic events and sorting through instead of trying to encase them. Too many "do not enter areas" in your mind will slow down connections, and also will inhibit the biochemicals that help make learning fun and easy. |
"This is better. It’s just better." —Jen Keefe
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Life *is* frustrating. Being mindful won't prevent kids from getting frustrated but it will be a huge step in the right direction. Seeing the world from kids' point of view will help you understand why they are reacting to the world as they are. Treat your kids as though they're doing the best they can with the knowledge and skills and understanding of the world they have. And often when they're at their worst, what works best is a hug. —Joyce Fetteroll |
For years I have recommended that new unschoolers stop using the word "teach" and replace all statements and thoughts with phrases using the word "learn" instead. I've gotten much flak back from people saying it doesn't matter, or that's "just semantics." What started as a theory with me became belief and then conviction. Unschoolers who cling to the idea of teaching will handicap their own understanding of how learning works. |
The same image, or toy, or building can be seen in many different ways. For a toddler, this could be a triangle, with a circle, and a rectangle. It might remind an older child of stories of magic houses, or of mysteries and adventures. Young adults' thoughts could be all about traditional construction, history, or "Is this for rent?" Angles are more than just mathematical or visual things. |
A family can learn to find abundance rather than lack, even if they're not wealthy.
Touch someone, or something, in a gentle, thoughtful way. Feel with your fingers, or cheek, or hand the warmth or smoothness or softness of something or someone you love. |