There is personal growth in quietly providing what is needed. The world is made better by those who notice and attend to needs. |
photo by Gail Higgins
There is personal growth in quietly providing what is needed. The world is made better by those who notice and attend to needs. |
I see so many families trying 'no limits' and then…I responded:
Two problems: "trying" and "no limits." If a kid knows the parent is only "trying" something, he will certainly take all he can get, desperately and in a frenzy.
"No limits" is not something any family should believe in, or promise their children The world has limits of all sorts. Parents don't need to add to that, but parents can't guarantee "no limits." They CAN give children lots of choices and options.
Gradual change would have helped.
Saying yes a thousand little times is better for everyone than one big confusing "Yes forever, don't care, OH WAIT! Take it back."
SandraDodd.com/cairns
photo by Sandra Dodd (in Albuquerque)
My "make the better choice" tool has helped me move from "acceptable" to "better" and then MORE better. 🙂JennyC:
It's nice to catch yourself in the moment and do better. The more you do it, the easier it is to do it.
Sandra's theory of "strewing" highlights the role of the parent, both in the support they provide children and how they reproduce enthusiasm for happenstance.
"What does unschooling look like at this age?"
Clare Kirkpatrick wrote:
It looks like it does at any age: fun and connection. Do what is fun for them. If you're also working on better connection with them, a closer relationship with them, you'll also start to learn what they may find fun that they don't yet know about. Also do what is fun for you. Learning to help yourself to do fun things will help you realise that your children's learning and richness of life will come from helping them to do things they find fun.At the moment in my house, I am having fun thinking hard about unschooling. My husband and my 12 year old are having fun and connecting with each other by playing Call of Duty together. I have helped my 6 and 8 year olds by making some space for them to build a little home for their polly pocket dolls out of wooden blocks and they are now having fun working on that and playing together. My 10 year old is having fun watching Mako Mermaids on Netflix and occasionally turning round to watch her sister and dad playing and ask questions about the game. Actually, while I've been writing that, the six year old has now snuggled next to my 12 year old to join in the chat about the game. Connection and fun. And, therefore, learning.
—Clare Kirkpatrick
https://sandradodd.com/clare.html#fun
photo: selfie by Sven, the dad