The easy way?

Q: Is unschooling the path of least resistance?

A: It depends what you're trying to resist.

Deschooling for Parents
photo by Sandra Dodd

Principles require thought

One reason principles work better than rules is that they require thought every single time. The best answer to most questions is "it depends."

If a person is answering most questions with "no," that is putting trouble in the bank to collect interest.

SandraDodd.com/principles
photo by Sarah Dickinson
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Too much "no"

One reason principles work better than rules is that they require thought every single time. The best answer to most questions is "it depends."

If a person is answering most questions with "no," that is putting trouble in the bank to collect interest.

SandraDodd.com/principles
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Always?

When people ask me "are you always going to homeschool them?" I say (very truthfully) "I don't know. It depends on them. I'm willing to, but if they decide they would rather go to school, that's fine."

The only people who have ever been unhappy with that response are those who are rigidly, defiantly homeschooling with a vengeance.

SandraDodd.com/choices
photo by Cathy Koetsier

The words are something I wrote in January 1993,
that popped up this week, 26 years later.

Courtesy and common sense

Don't bring your hot dog to the vegan friend's house. Don't bring stinky food to places where others can't get away. Don't bring great-smelling food to a hospital room where someone is on a restricted diet, or on an IV with no food allowed.
. . . . "It depends" is a good first answer when someone asks whether something is or is not okay. There is no "rule" that says unschoolers can eat anything they want any time. But there should not be arbitrary restrictions, just really logical, sensible ones involving courtesy and common sense.

SandraDodd.com/foodrules
photo by Sandra Dodd

Feed passions...cake.

Feed passions.

Unschooling depends on children being able to follow their interests, but just as with food, it's hard to know whether they want to just taste it or finish off a case.

If a child wants to bake a cake, you don't know in advance whether she just wanted to mix the batter once or whether she will end up creating wedding cakes for millionaires. You don't need to know.

Feed Passions
photo by Sandra Dodd

Open the world up

Joyce Fetteroll:

Unschooling is a whole way of life not a method. That might sound like a quibble but it gets to the heart of why unschooling is different than other ways of homeschooling.

Homeschooling has a particular destination that the parents want to get the kids to. The destination depends on the method and the parents. (A typical destination is preparation for college.)

Unschooling is about helping kids be who they are and to grow into who they'll become. The destination is wherever the kids end up. It isn't predetermined by the parents. Our job is to support who they are and open the world up to them so they have opportunities to expand their interests.

—Joyce Fetteroll

https://www.joyfullyrejoycing.com/no-right-or-wrong-way-to-unschool
photo by Joyce Fetteroll
of a lizard on a rock
in New Mexico
in January

Choices, priorities and locations

Laying "have to" on our kids, or on ourselves or on outsiders is less useful and healthy than looking at rights and choices and priorities and locations.

Can you jump on the bed?

Depends whose bed, which bed, where, when. Is someone sleeping? Is it an antique? Who owns this bed?


SandraDodd.com/etiquette
(original, in a discussion on facebook)
photo by some realtor, once,
in a house that's now Holly Dodd's