Hobbit age of majority

Yesterday our youngest turned 33 years old. As I write this, her brothers are at her birthday party. Kirby is providing karaoke.

They are all in their thirties. Kirby will be in his 30s until late summer of 2026. He has been married for eight years, and Marty for nearly a decade.

In 2007, I wrote this:

Our family is experiencing a sort of magic window. As of November 2, our children (who are no longer children) have attained a set of momentous ages: 21, 18 and 16. This alignment ends on January 14, when Marty turns 19, but for a couple of months we have the only and last set of landmark years we'll ever have.

Our two boys are at the traditional ages of majority in different ways, in different places and times. Kirby is a man. Marty is a junior man. Our baby and only girl is "sweet sixteen."

The memories of them at all their ages are like sweet ghosts around me.

SandraDodd.com/magicwindow
photo by Sandra Dodd

Photos by, or art by, or mentions of Holly Dodd in other posts

Learning by looking, doing, exploring

Meredith Novak wrote:

It's good to know that it's not necessary to totally understand everything you read (or listen to) the first time through. I think that's one of the misconceptions people get from school's "read it and answer the questions" format. It's okay to skim through something the first time and just get a general idea, then, if you're still interested, go back and read for more detail later - maybe after reading or hearing something else, first, that clarifies those details.

But that's learning in the sense of "taking in information" - and learning is more than that. Learning also comes from doing things, exploring objects and processes, places and ideas. Much as I like storing up facts like a magpie, I do most of my learning by taking things apart and putting them back together. If I have a question, I'm as likely to look for person to show me what I need as I am to look for a book. I *can* figure things out from books, but often I can learn the same thing more effectively by watching someone else.

—Meredith

SandraDodd.com/awareness
photo by Roya Dedeaux

One of those people

So they say, "Okay, well I have heard and I've read that people have done... something? and then they get good results?" That's not enough to move on, but it's enough to read a little and try a little. Because they've seen other people say it worked, they can start trying it. And still they ought to be skeptical. Everybody ought to be skeptical about anything this crazy.

So see how it's going at your house. Tweak it. Move more toward a good relationship. Move toward being more present, and then you start to understand. Then you start to be one of the people who's saying, "I tried this, and this was the result I got: my kids seem to be getting along better. My kids seem to be interested in more things. They're curious. They're conversational. They can deal with younger people, and older people."

SandraDodd.com/crazy
photo by Alex Polikowsky,
of a girl who is now off at university

Cats, for real

For fun, today, maybe think about the nature of cats. There are pet cats, acting-and-modelling cats, folklore and humor about cats, fantasy cats, cartoon cats, imagery, song, and story of cats. Wild cats, musical cats, cool cats. Thinking about what IS a cat will help with thinking about the "is"ness of all other things.

SandraDodd.com/reality
photo by Brie Jontry of painting by Noor JontryMasterson
who also created the cat art here: SandraDodd.com/art/

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Exploring, playing, remembering

Exploring different media and tools, playing with art and ideas, and making nice memories.

Life as Show-and-Tell
photo by Sandra; scratch-art by younger Devyn Dodd

Let light shine through you.

See how that cut-out affected the table, and the light? It's in Wales, but we can see it wherever we are today. See how that little jack-o-lantern ornament affected so much of the world?

I love the light through that orange bottle. Beautiful. I like the pumpkin, or gourd, too.

Janine saw all of that, and took a photo. I saw that photo, and sent it to you.

Beauty and patterns are all around us.

Let light shine through you.
SandraDodd.com/curiosity
photo by Janine Davies

Native thoughtfulness and competence

If we've been conditioned to believe that children are unworthy and inferior but we consciously step away from that place and see the wholeness in our children, then one of the easiest things to see is the lack of wholeness in ourselves. It can be frightening.

When we see the level of thoughtfulness and competence a small child can have when he hasn’t been belittled or discouraged or shushed, we can start to think that if we undo the discouraging, belittling and shushing voices inside of us, we might regenerate our own native thoughtfulness and competence.

Mindful Parenting / SandraDodd.com/rentalk
photo by Jo Isaac (a wedge-tailed eagle)
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