Stillness

Beautiful moments of stillness and calm are around us all the time. Sometimes we notice.

Look Quietly
photo by Annie Regan, who wrote "Possibly my favourite spot in the whole world.
Cradle Mountain, Tasmania, just on sunrise in this photo"
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Same old appreciation

Same old sink, same old dishes. Same house, day after day.

But look how, randomly, the spoon and fork handles all pointed in different directions. Look how the light hits things. The sky reflected down into my sink!

I am grateful to have that sink and those dishes. My house keeps us safer, cooler in summer, warmer in winter, day after day.

A dirty pot means we had food, and a stove to cook it over. Dirty bowls mean people ate. That is something to be happy about.

SandraDodd.com/dishes
photo by Sandra Dodd

Recovering

There were days not long ago when we did things that now seem problematical. Running in a bubble another kid would run in next. Hugging and kissing people in public. Crowding, laughing, into shared vehicles or public transportation to go and ride and climb and slide and explore.

I've lived past and through things that seemed terrible, but I knew my parents and grandparents had seen worse. In each and every case, the world went back to normal, and sometimes better, in one way or another, or in many ways.
Things can seem grim and limiting, but somehow, it will rain and shine and plants and trees will grow, and children will run and play in more and different places.

I'm impressed with every family staying home with children, when it's hard to do. I salute you. I hope you can live it one more day, and then again, in sweet, creative ways.

Make happy memories, however you can.

SandraDodd.com/morning
photo by Amber Ivey

Tension of the best kind

The term "tension" can bring to mind "nervous tension," or "feeling tense," but there is a bigger, better concept to envision when thinking about relationships and of living well with children for years.

Uplifting forces should be balanced by weighty, anchoring, solid foundations. Both together are what can create a solid structure within which to live a safe yet expanding life.

Tension (the useful kind)
photo by Tara Joe Farrell

Optimistic happy people

Alex Polikowsky wrote:

Surround yourself with optimistic happy people. Do not engage in conversation when people are complaining about their children or husbands. If a friend comes to complain about her kids I try to turn around and point out to them how that characteristic could be good or some other great thing about their children. Or I change the subject.

Look at what you have, not what you do not have. If all you focus is in negative things that is all you will see. If you always look for the positive slowly you will, more and more, see the positive and the beauty around you and that will become who you are.

—Alex Polikowsky

SandraDodd.com/alex/optimism
photo by Daniel Moyer Artisan

Listen, honestly

Robyn Coburn wrote:

How do we as parents show that we respect our children, that we are parenting respectfully? One big way is by genuinely listening to them. One way is by being honest with them about our own feelings, and telling the truth about events, or unexaggerated truthful reasons about why things can or cannot occur.

—Robyn Coburn

Thoughts on Respect
photo by Cass Kotrba

Exploring, playing, relationships

Schuyler Waynforth wrote:

We have chosen to listen to our children, to pay attention to their needs and their wants instead of telling them that they must conform to our needs and our wants.


It means that for me if Simon (my 8 year old son) asks me to help him play Tales of Symphonia on the gamecube and I happen to be doing the dishes I may ask that he wait the 10 minutes or more likely than not I may just let the dishes soak and come and play with him. The dishes will be easier to clean when I empty the sink and refill it with warm water and I will have gotten to spend an hour with my son talking and exploring and playing and continuing to forge a relationship that makes me so happy I cannot begin to express my joy.

SandraDodd.com/schuyler/rant
That was from an unusual (for Schuyler) rant in 2007.

Here are some newer words from this ever-thoughtful unschooling mom:
Schuyler Waynforth Interview

photo by Sandra Dodd, of Schuyler's cat in 2009