Do what will help your baby. Be the gentlest, sweetest, most attentive mother you can possibly be, and you will be putting peace in the bank for you and your whole family.
Though that was written about infants, it could work with older kids, too! SandraDodd.com/mentalhealth photo by Lydia Koltai __
There is a difference between lack-of-mental-illness and mental health. What I mean is that one is not right on the edge of the other. There is a large land between being incapacitated and being really healthy and energetic and usful to other people. Don't settle for barely-back. Go for healthy.
A different approach to life yields a very different set of results.
You don't have to turn 180 degrees from the way you would have lived before you decided to parent differently. At first it might seem pretty close. But as you move further from the starting point, you will see what a difference a tiny change of course made.
It helps a lot to try for better moments not days. Don't judge a day by one upset, judge it as a bad moment and move forward. A little bit better each moment. A little bit more aware.
It was nice to be more quiet—to let things go unsaid. Not talking automatically and at length gave me more time to think about what I really wanted to say, if anything at all. I found I had fewer regrets—wishing I'd said something different or not at all. By talking less, I became a better listener too, I think.
I have comforted my "inner child" by comforting my own children. I have felt like a stronger, better person by being a stronger, better mom. Then it's not imagination, it's reality.
Helping them grow up whole helped me feel more full and whole myself.