Happy and Glad

I wrote this of Kirby, in 2005 when he was 18 years old:

He's confident in his skin, in his mind, and in his being.
He's not afraid of his parents.
He goes to sleep happy and he wakes up glad.

My priorities could have been different.

SandraDodd.com/priorities
photo by Sandra Dodd

Peaceful communication

Peace, in an exchange, has to do with tone of voice, eyes, posture, attitude, intention, compassion—all the non-verbal communications that go with words and actions. Don't underestimate your child's ability to read beneath and around and beyond your statements. You would do well to try to read behind his words, too.

SandraDodd.com/parentingpeacefully
photo by Sandra Dodd

Choose to see abundance

Jenny Cyphers wrote:

In order for kids to feel and see abundance, they first must have parents who feel and see it too, even if there is no money. Go to parks, pick up sticks, ride bikes to new places, swing on the swing differently, make bubbles and blow them in front of a fan. Look at stars at night and try to find constellations, light things on fire with magnifying glass, roast hot dogs for dinner (it's cheap), the possibilities are limitless, but only if you choose to see them. THAT is what will help your kids learn how to be creative thinkers—seeing and doing creative things.

—Jenny Cyphers

SandraDodd.com/abundance.html
photo by Kristi Beguin
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The trail starts to open up

In the middle of something a little longer, about becoming an unschooling parent, Pam Sorooshian wrote:

Overly self-centered people can't do it because it requires a lot of empathy. People with too many personal problems that they haven't addressed in their own lives probably can't do it because they are too distracted by those. People who are too negative or cynical can't do it because they tend to crush interest and joy, not build it up. People who lack curiosity and a certain amount of gusto for life can't really do it.

On the other hand, we grow into it. Turns out that we parents learn, too.

So—when we are making moves, taking steps, in the direction of unschooling, turns out the trail starts to open up in front of us and we get more and more sure-footed as we travel the unschooling path.

—Pam Sorooshian

SandraDodd.com/lazy/parents
photo by Sandra Dodd

The Full Plate Club

The food section of my website is called "The Full Plate Club." Its intro says:

"The empty plate club," referring to kids who successfully clean their plates, sounds so sad.

"Full plate" sounds much more nurturing.

On questions of whether a cup is half full or half empty, consider a plate. If a child has a feeling of abundance he will stop eating when he's had enough and be healthier and happier than if anyone presses him to take one more bite.


SandraDodd.com/food
photo by Sandra Dodd

Being with your child

If watching TV is his thing and complaining about TV is your thing, you spoiled a chance to have a shared thing.

SandraDodd.com/t/sharing
photo by Holly Dodd

Free tools

You need to do MANY things, as an unschooling parent. Free tools are being added to these collections just about every day:
Joyfully Rejoycing (Joyce's site)

SandraDodd.com/

LivingJoyfully.ca (Pam Laricchia's site)

Read a little, try a little, wait a while, watch.

Don't overcomplicate, don't oversimplify.


Paraphrased from a post on Always Learning; this site will work:
SandraDodd.com/howto/precisely
photo by Sandra Dodd

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2020 note:

In cleaning up old posts with more solid images and links, I replaced Always Learning, in the list above, with Pam Laricchia's site. Always Learning still exists, and at a better hosting site, but people aren't using e-mail as much as they once did. The Always Learning archives are open here if you want to read, and if you want to join and try to stir the discussion up, I would not mind!