How many times can you say "no"?

Sometimes I've advised people to pretend they only have three hundred "no's"—they have a little ticket they have to spend every time they say no. And they better save some because some people use them up before the kid’s three.

What if your child grows up and you still have 150 tickets left that you can chuck in the trash? That’s pretty cool.

SandraDodd.com/yes
photo by Sandra Dodd

The quote is from a March 16, 2005 interview.
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Fascination

"The best thing you can do for your child is be fascinated by life. 🙂 Get rid of that cloak of dullness that school draped over everything. Relearn how to explore just for the sake of exploring not because it's good for you or because it will be on the test or because it could be good for you one day. Do what's fascinating right now."

—Joyce Fetteroll

"Products" of Education
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Laughing and Smiling

Most of the best things that have happened, I didn’t foresee. I just can’t bring myself to think that a day spent laughing and smiling and doing things that are enjoyable is bad.

SandraDodd.com/radio
photo by Sandra Dodd
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Learning about learning

Replace any form of the verb "to teach" with "to learn." It will involve some rephrasing, and sometimes you have to back up and totally revise the statement or the idea. Replace "I taught him…" with "He learned…". Replace "I plan to teach him…" with "When he learns…" (You might want to retroactively revise your earlier thoughts too. If you think you taught your child to eat or talk or walk, you might want to replace those memories with "He learned to walk by pulling himself up and trying it," and so on.)

SandraDodd.com/deschooling
photo by Sandra Dodd

Drop anchor.

Sink-Like-a-Stone Method: Instead of skimming the surface of a subject or interest, drop anchor there for a while.

If someone is interested in chess, mess with chess. Not just the game, but the structure and history of tournaments. How do chess clocks work? What is the history of the names and shapes of the playing pieces? What other board games are also traditional and which are older than chess? If you're near a games shop or a fancy gift shop, wander by and look at different chess sets on display. It will be like a teeny chess museum. The interest will either increase or burn out—don't push it past the child's interest.

When someone understands the depth and breadth of one subject, he will know that any other subject has breadth and depth.

SandraDodd.com/checklists
photo by Sandra Dodd
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What to do?

Don't do what other people do, do what your kids need.



sandraeurope2011.blogspot.com
photo by Sandra Dodd

Birds

Joyce Fetteroll wrote:

To unschool, you begin with your child's interests. If she's interested in birds, you read - or browse, toss aside, just look at the pictures in - books on birds, watch videos on birds, talk about birds, research and build (or buy) bird feeders and birdhouses, keep a journal on birds, record and ponder their behavior, search the web for items about birds, go to bird sanctuaries, draw birds, color a few pictures in the Dover Birds of Prey coloring book, play around with feathers, study Leonardo DaVinci's drawings of flying machines that he based on birds, watch Alfred Hitchcock's "The Birds."

But don't go whole hog on this. Gauge how much to do and when by your child's reactions. Let her say no thanks. Let her choose. Let her interest set the pace. If it takes years, let it take years. If it lasts an hour, let it last an hour.

—Joyce Fetteroll

SandraDodd.com/joyce/steps
photo by Sandra Dodd, of a dovecote at a house in France